Burnt Out at Twenty
Never had I felt so… drained
“The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another” — William James
Overachieving always came naturally to me growing up, from the feeling of having to make A’s throughout school to being the president of clubs and different organizations.
I loved the validation those accomplishments gave me, and I would do anything to achieve those.
To continue my overachieving accomplishments, I even went to an early college where I got an associate's Degree when I graduated from High School. Most people responded, “You are just so smart” and “Wow, you are so lucky,” but it didn’t prepare me like people thought.
I loved High School and all it brought to me, but it didn’t prepare me for the feeling of complete drainage that I would feel going into college.
I don’t think I have ever felt such a lack of motivation in my entire life.
After 13 years of public school schooling where I thrived where I loved, I’m now struggling to get through classes others fly through.
How could I handle going to school every day from 7 a.m. to 4 p.m. and being unable to handle two classes in one day?
My life isn’t what I would consider difficult, but it's the point where I make it difficult for myself.
I no longer felt like me.
How Do You Know If You Are Burnt Out?
Burnout looks different for everyone, and no right person has the right answer on how you know if you are experiencing this.
What made me realize I was so burnt out was dreading doing things I used to love and finding myself not wanting to go to things that people I loved or am friends with were also going to.
It’s hard to realize that, though, and my friends helped me realize when I was pulling myself away from things that I once loved, and that helped me realize what was going on in my life.
Sometimes, it’s just way too difficult to engage in things that may have brought you so much joy in the past that now bring you stress, which is valid.
It’s all about realizing how your stress and negative emotions start to effect your daily life around you because they have a hold on everything in your life sometimes.
What Did I Do?
I started taking time for myself and learning how I needed to be cared for. I’m human; I deserve care just like everyone else.
The hard part of accepting the truth about this statement is admitting it to others. I found that the most challenging part of all.
Telling the people I love, especially family, that I needed to start going to therapy or prioritizing myself was hard because I instantly thought they wouldn’t understand what that meant.
Burnout is something that people joke about all the time when, in reality, it started to crush my career to pieces. My grades were terrible, and nothing was helping until I started advocating for myself.
Sometimes, we must be our biggest advocates; I will continue to stand by that.
Feeling life's excessive and prolonged stress and not knowing what to do with yourself is pretty terrifying, and no one should be alone in going through it.
Burnout is no joke, so take some time and learn to care for yourself.
You’re human.
