Longing…

Intense longing mixed with nostalgia.

Intense longing for the known.

Nostalgic memories filled with the known.

I walk around with a blank gaze.

Eyes downcast.

Running the memories of the known over and over in my head.

Again and again.

Wondering where it all went wrong.

I look ahead and I see the future shrouded with uncertainties and I find myself fighting not to run back to what I know, the known.

Fighting against myself.

Just me against me.

An internal battle with no winner in sight.

A longing so deep, my heart aches with each memory.

A longing so deep, It stirs my forgotten emotions all over again.

A longing so deep, I find myself clenching my eyes shut tightly with each memory.

A longing so deep, I find myself clutching onto the memories tightly.

A longing so deep, that makes my eyes water and my fists clench in response.

Almost like a reflex, I’d say.

Memories running rampant In my head.

Not particularly good memories, but memories are memories all the same.

I thought you were on my team.

But clearly, I was fighting the world and myself all alone, on my own.

Me against me.

Me against the world.

Longing for the known…