In my culture, we are taught to be humble since young. Yes, no doubt this is a good virtue. However, there is a shortcoming I feel has made us lose out when comes to the competition.
By the world standard, we are overly humble. It is to the extent that our achievements are being undervalued by some people, who usually have little understanding of our culture.
For example in a job interview, when we’re being asked, “How would you rate your achievements from a score of 0 to 10, whereby 0 means very poor and 10 means excellent?”
Typically we would answer, “7” or “8”, Even if we scored 10.
When someone complimented us “Excellent job!’. We would reply,” No, it’s just average.”
When we think we stand a high chance of helping someone or solving a problem, we would still say, “No promise but I will do my best.”, or “It should turn out okay.”
We are so worried just in case we can’t fulfill our promise due to any unforeseen circumstances. We always try to promise less but try to deliver higher results than expected.
For us, fulfilling our promise is important.
We may appear to be overly modest. This made us seem less valuable compared to other candidates who exaggerate their achievements to impress the interviewer.
I’ve encountered people(not from my culture) who when approached for help, said confidently, “No problem, I’ll get you a job in no time!”, or “No worries, I’ll get it done for you!”
What happened often was they never delivered what they claimed! But they sound so convincing that we actually believed them, only to find out later they never did.
So, who do you think clinched the job, or landed the big job? Of course, not us!
I think this is due to the cultural differences. The world’s dominant culture is known for being direct and outspoken. But my culture tends to speak subtly because of our cultural upbringing.
I think we should learn to speak more confidently which reflects the actual achievements. Being unduly humble at the wrong place and time doesn’t serve us well.
It’s so deeply ingrained in us for generations, that it takes effort to change and accustom to it.
The above is only my experience, observations, and sharings from friends alike in the international community over the years. It may not apply to all at large.
Check out this emotional piece about emotion by Sahil Patel:
And a beautiful symphony of nature and words by Elvie:
