I Hate Mondays

I did it! It’s Friday! I made it through the week to another weekend. Ahh, the weekend. The time when we can make believe that we lead a life free from arbitrary norms and cultural expectations. The time where we can throw off some of our confounding responsibilities and pursue our passions. I’ve paid a high cost this week to get here. I’ve sacrificed time with my wife and kids. I’ve used my limited bandwidth doing what I am “supposed to do” all week. This weekend, I’ll try to make up for lost time. I’ll do some things I love. I’ll be intentional about being present, in the moment, with my family. I will make every effort to soak it up, to fill my belly to carry me through next week. But I know what’s coming, especially Sunday evening. Monday. It’s just around the corner. It’s churning below the surface like a riptide waiting to suck me back out to the deep water. Where it is all I can do to keep my head above water. Where I’m in no position to be present and enjoy the scenery. There may be gulls over my head, sail boats to my left and a pod of dolphins to my right. It’s truly beautiful and amazing, but I cannot see them. They may as well not be there because I am kicking with all my might just to stay at the surface. I’m too distracted.

I hate Monday’s! They are the transition point that takes me from my beach chair, so to speak, enjoying a sea breeze to the deep, choppy water. If I feel this way, are my kids riding a wave of joy and satisfaction through the week? My wife? No way! My kids go to school each day to a place where the mission is to pass tests. With that being the case, the strategies used at school are reflective of that mission. Test, test, test! What’s that sweetie; you’ve found a passion in your life? Sorry, we don’t have time for that. Please get out your math book. Are you kidding me!? Here I am trying to jump off this train, and I am continually purchasing my kids’ tickets to keep them on. Don’t get me wrong, my kids have some fantastic adults in their lives at school, but the problem is systemic. I am a middle school teacher for crying out loud. I am part of this system. This is madness! Is this it? Is this the optimal experience I have to offer my family while we are on this big round rock? I believe our time extends beyond this planet for sure. That said, does our time here have to be so freaking linear, duty filled, and lack luster?

I am learning the answer is, no. I am an optimist. There must be more, another path. I’m seeking it out. It will be a journey, but as long as my eyes are open and I am seeking an escape from the hamster wheel, I will find my way. When I say find my way, I mean for myself and my family. I am not looking to ride off into the sunset with a new motorcycle that I can’t afford. I am extremely mindful of the journey, the process. So this work for the weekend stuff doesn’t sit right with me. When I’m in the gym, I’m enjoying the process of getting stronger. I can appreciate the minutiae of training and improving weaknesses. I’m not in there just to reach a certain weight on a lift. If that is the goal, what do you do when you reach it? It will leave you empty the next day if that is the totality of the goal. Don’t get me wrong PR’s get me pumped, but it is all about the journey. It is a lifelong pursuit of strength of mind and body. When it comes to life’s trajectory, I just need to know that my frontend is pointed toward something new, great, and adventurous. Circumstances don’t have to be perfect right now. What would that even look like? If there was such a thing as perfect, tomorrow would leave you empty. Enjoyment in life is about contrast. You must experience discomfort to truly appreciate the thrill of something great. I just need to feel the progressive movement (not of the political variety). I am starting to ramble. What is the bottom line? I want to love Mondays. I want them to be a continuation of everything that is great about life. Not a stake in the ground that marks a brutal reality check. There must be something more for me and my family, and I am going to dig it out. Light it up! Tackle it with full aggression. Will you do the same? Unplug from the system and pursue life.