What is Motivation Really? Why You Need to be Your Own Motivator–
“The question isn’t who is going to let me. It is who is going to stop me.” — Ayn Rand
“Be so good they can’t ignore you.” — Steve Martin
“Work hard, have fun, make history.” — Jeff Bezos
Who has not heard of “motivation”? And you and I have been there — reading some motivational quote or an inspiring write-up when we so want to do something worthwhile, and then feeling that positive energy in our spirit right away! (And there are also days when those motivational quotes mean nothing, or worse, make us feel only worse, we’ll come there.)
What is Motivation?
In simple terms, motivation can be defined as a reason or set of reasons that push you to act in a certain way, or the reason behind your behaviour and action. Do you see a person from a poor family studying and working really hard? Maybe they want to get themselves and their family out of that state of poverty to a much better position in life. Do you have a friend who studies really hard for their exams? Maybe they aim to get their dream job? Have a friend that works out regularly? Probably they want to be fit, healthy, and strong. Motivation need not always be this simple and innocent, but you get it.
The Importance of Motivation:
Those that have studied psychology, to be more specific, organizational psychology, educational psychology, and social psychology, and neuroscience would know that the theories on motivation in these subjects differ much, and some can contradict others as in, when motivation is termed as “reward” in one of these theories , in one of these fields, in another, it could be seen as a disturbance!
Also, motivation can be confusing sometimes. (What a funny irony it is that I am feeling sleepy while typing this when I’d spent hours this morning making notes to write this blog post on motivation! Does that mean humour is a coping mechanism here? Let’s not get distracted now.)
“Motivation is important in almost every aspect of human behavior. When you make a decision, your choice is certainly influenced by your motivational state. If you are motivated, you learn better and remember more of what you learned. Do rewards enhance learning outcomes? According to recent findings in cognitive neuroscience, the answer seems to be yes. In sum, motivation matters. But at the same time, we need a comprehensive picture of how different types of motivation fit and function together to produce behavior.” — American Psychological Association
Who can be a good motivator? What does it take to become a good motivational speaker yourself?
Consider all those whom you have been motivated by so far — either someone in your personal circle or professional network or academic setting or motivational coaches and successful celebrities. They motivated and inspired you through either speeches or action or books. Try and recollect something they said — something so interesting that actually had the power to make you take that step, that action.
“You have everything it takes to become a successful writer. Your creativity, your love for language, your clarity, and your strong need to push people to think differently, so keep writing,” said a writer I love and respect much. “Are these skills really a gift? So I must make use of them …” On bad days, on the darkest hours, or even when I am in my best form, these words linger in the back of my head.
“Counselling is not easy. At the end of the day, you’d feel like a dustbin, that people only come to you when they have problems to pour out, and they might not even remember you when they have reached new heights, when they have overcome their problems. But if you still want to help, go ahead!” said my mentor, who motivated me to become a psychotherapist. “Could it really be that taxing? No challenge I can’t face. I will take it up!”
You see, to different words and actions, our brains respond differently. So motivation can come in various forms: as uplifting words, or as a challenge daring you to go through the process, or as a push provoking you to just go on a hunt for the reward.
But if you notice one thing, all those who are successful at being good motivators that others can look up to, including yourself would have one or more of these qualities: optimism and positive energy, achievers in some field or another, quite smart and clever enough to know how to provoke someone to do something, someone that is strongly determined, and those who find satisfaction in success for themselves and others. Without these qualities, you and I can’t be convinced to let just anyone make us make a certain move in a certain direction, obviously!
Why Should You Be Your Own Motivator?
When I look back at my past, to be honest, yes, on a few significant occasions, words from and the actions of my mentors, mates, fellow aspiring youngsters, seniors, and even people who hated me have been highly powerful. And on normal days, when I’d want to get something done (whether what “something” really is on that day is even clear to me or not), I do Google for my favourite achievers’ words and check my own notes and journals to see if I can find some motivation — sometimes it would, and some other times, it might not.
But what I do consider my greatest achievements till date, moments and rewards I am very proud of, all happened because I wanted a change: I motivated myself to go do what I would like to see or experience because I was tired of just dreaming and not doing anything, when I finally realized that no matter what, I will go ahead and “just do it”! The first step in my adulthood in my journey of becoming independent, taking up some cause or social justice issue seriously when I saw that nobody around seemed to be doing what needs to be done, being a rebel of a woman, and standing my ground no matter what I faced — in all these times, not only was the difficulty of level of the game so high, but I was equally tough as the game itself or tougher.
Also, during many of these occasions, I can tell honestly that there was nobody there by my side — not one person around to give me either moral support or even listen to my rants and discuss my confusion or struggle and plans or strategies with. The outcomes in these phases were the result of some of the bravest moves I have made in life so far. These life lessons taught me practically that nobody would be there by your side every time you need them, be they a family member or a best friend or a significant other. Nobody is obliged to be present in your life whenever you need them. No matter how harsh it sounds, that’s the truth.
And there can’t be any greater satisfaction when you have achieved something significant (in your own measures) while being independent and also hardworking, so the credit goes to you and only you. This will take your confidence to a whole new level, and you’d feel so good that people around you, maybe even those who hated, left, and weren’t there for you in the past, might look up to you for motivation.
Be there for you, always. Be there holding your back no matter what goes right and what falls down. Never betray yourself! And motivate others to do the same.
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This article was originally published in: https://refineredefine.in/blog/
