If no one would judge you, what would you do differently?

Was there something that came to mind immediately? Something that if other people’s judgement or perceptions weren’t apart of the equation, would totally free you? Listen, we know there’s a lot of advice out there that tells you to not care about what people think. But we also know that this is actually a really really hard thing to do. Of course you care about what people think! We all do. What’s important is to have awareness around it. Instead, try to operate alongside that voice in your head telling you to care what people are saying or thinking.

Remember, no one is as worried about what you’re doing and saying as you think. Consider the fact that the average person has on average 50,000 thoughts a day according to a study done by the national science foundation. So if someone thought about you a few times in a day, that means it’s only a small tenths of a percent of their thoughts that day. Which is nothing. Because like you, they’re focused on themselves. We are, afterall, the center of our own universes. So that reminder alone can be somewhat freeing.

What does matter, however is where you’re holding your own life back because you care so much about what others are thinking. It’s the first step to moving your life beyond that artificial boundary of caring about what someone is thinking. Maybe you want to cut your hair but are scared of what your mom would think. Maybe there’s someone you want to date but are too worried about other people’s opinions. Maybe you have a big dream that you’re keeping in hiding because you fear the judgement. Simply knowing that this is happening for you is an important first step in being able to move beyond it.

So what was that thing that you’ve refrained from doing because of other peoples opinions? If you have it in your head, then ask yourself what you’d need to let go of in order to do it anyways. Does the thought of moving forward really excite you? Then that’s a sign that your energy towards it is bigger than the fear of other people’s judgements. Make sense?

Commit to trying to do this thing, even in a small way. Remind yourself that no one actually cares as much as you think. And also know that there will always be judgements. The more you know yourself and act in a way that alignment with what matters most to you, the quieter those voices will get and the bolder you’ll be able to be in your own life.