Why dreaming is crucial
Dreaming is fascinating, isn’t it? You can’t help but wonder what is going on inside your mind for those vivid images pop by.
Do they mean something? Are they sent from your soul? Are you secretly an incredible artist waiting to burst out of your current bubble of blandness?
Well, this article isn’t about that.
This article isn’t about the kind of dreaming that you have no control over. The ones that happen when you sleep, I mean.
This article is about the kind of dreaming we can control.
And why it is so incredibly crucial for your mental health.
Choose a dream for yourself
You are in your twenties, thirties. And on average, you have 50–60 years left of your life. What will happen in those years? What will you make of them?
Alright, that might be too many years to go over.
So let’s scroll right to the end instead. Take a moment with me to imagine yourself as old, 5–10 years away from kicking the bucket.
What pops up?
Personally, I’m gray-haired and dancing to Lizzo on my beautiful porch. Sure, Lizzo probably won’t be in at that time, but ‘Truth Hurts’ will always demand some bad-ass moves.
I dream that even when I’m 70 years old, I will oblige and bust out my stuff. With friends and family around me trying to keep up with my energy.
Now, you may have guessed it. Aspirations are the kind of dreaming I am talking about here.
The dictionary defines the act of dreaming as indulging in daydreams or fantasies about something greatly desired.
Dreaming of this kind is about wanting something even better than what already is. It is about getting in touch with what excites you and motivates you to move forward.
Dreaming is being optimistic
Dreaming of this kind is being optimistic. It is expecting good things to happen to you.
There are numerous psychological studies relating optimism with better mental health.
It can influence the quality of your relationships, the way you cope with stress and adversity, and improve your physical health.
Some psychologists even argue that being optimistic can work as an antidote to psychological distress such as depression and anxiety, which, as we all know, is on the rise. Not just globally, but personally as well. We all either know someone struggling, or have ourselves been struggling.
So how can we infuse some more optimism into our little corners of the world? By dreaming of a better future.
So let me ask you: What do you dream of?
It’s a broad question, I know. But if you can, take this unique moment to ask yourself something you may not have otherwise. Let this question resound in your mind like the pulsating vibrations of a church gong.
What do I dream of?
You are welcome to pause here before moving on.
Turn your dream into steps to make it come true
What did that feel like? Did you manage to visualize something worth striving for?
I hope you did.
Now, this next part is where setting goals come in handy. Psychologists have become increasingly aware that psychological well being comes from the pursuit and progress towards goals. Perceiving that we are progressing releases dopamine and makes us feel good.
This means you don’t have to reach the goals before you can start reaping all of the psychological benefits — moving towards your goals is enough.
So, when I envision myself at 70 years old dancing to Lizzo on my porch, there are several mini-goals I can focus on moving towards.
For example, I want to be in good enough shape to dance as old. I want to have enough money to have a porch (maybe even a house to go with it). And I want relationships that I have nurtured throughout my life.
Zooming back to 20-something me; whenever I take care of my health by exercising, limiting stress, sleeping, and eating well, I get a boost of dopamine. Whenever I work on my career and make plans about future incomes, I will be zoned in. And whenever I spend time nurturing relations with my friends and family or solve a conflict, I feel excited and motivated.
Why?
Because these investments, and the progress that follow them (better health, more robust economy, and nurtured relations), are all signals to me that I am on the right track. They help me reap the benefits of optimism and goal-setting.
But only because I have made it clear what my dream is.
So your task is this:
Dream.
Set binding goals accordingly.
Write them down.
Make it your responsibility to make that dream come true and ask yourself how likely you are to succeed. How you will do it. And what signals you could look for to tell you that you are on the right track.
I want to emphasize that this is not a “happy-go-lucky” approach. There are endless amounts of self-help literature stressing the importance of “smiling your way through the pain” or “just thinking positively.”
This is not that.
Dreaming about your future, visualizing the process, and setting step-wise goals is not a blissfully ignorant approach to life. It’s pragmatic and realistic.
Life might throw you curveballs.
Actually, scratch that.
Life will throw you curveballs. Definitely. It can fuck you up completely and take most of what you value away from you. With the blink of an eye. And there will be nothing you can do to prevent that from happening to you.
You could even argue that being pessimistic is more realistic since shit is bound to occur.
Dreaming about the future you want for yourself may — in this sense — seem meaningless.
What is the point of dreaming and working for things becoming better today, when tomorrow it may all be taken away?
The best answer I have been able to find is this:
There isn’t anything better you can do.
There isn’t anything better you can do with your life than continue working towards and dreaming about things becoming increasingly better and feel good during the process.
But I think that is good enough.
Don’t you?
