3 years in
August 4, 2014 marked my first day in my post-graduate position — my current position. I came in fresh out of graduate school eager to apply what I had learned, excited to finally be in the field. It was surreal. All my hard work and all those student loans (which I wasn’t completely sure what the amount was), It was going to be a challenge — I had no experience with medical student development or working with medical students but I was determined to learn and apply what I did know.
It hasn’t been the easiest three years. I’ve had my struggles, my moments of burn out, nights of bringing home the stress and it resulting in tears that became the norm. How could I be so unhappy? I should be grateful, right? I have a J.O.B. I’m working in my field. Everything should be good but it wasn’t. Hard to explain why I had moments of wanting to leave the field completely. I found a safe haven with colleagues and loved ones that kept me sane.
I lost count of the number of applications that I submitted in the last year — I’ve lost hope. Sounds very depressing? I know because I lived it. I dreaded going to work. Only things that kept me going were the amazing students that I worked with. Their passion and interest in themselves, others, and their college was always present. I lost my drive and a piece of myself because I allowed myself to get caught up in the politics and the “NO’s” that I got. Misery loves company and I was a regular visitor. I attended ACPA and NASPA to stay connected with the field and with those that encouraged me regardless of where they were in the country — whether it was Texas, Miami, or California; they kept me grounded and sane.
As I begin my 4th year in this role and as a professional, I have learned many lessons — from what I don’t need and what I absolutely value. I’m going in with a different outlook and with the opportunity to finally be true to myself and why I came into this beautiful yet challenging and imperfect field. I finally had the opportunity to do what I love. As our first year medical students go into their orientation this upcoming Monday, I’m excited for the new programs that I am able to develop and the ones that I can contribute and continue improving.
After some much needed time-off, I was able to refocus, re-energize, and bum around for a little; I feel rejuvenated and ready to take on this year. I’m finally taking a step back from actively job searching and embracing the opportunity that has been given to me this upcoming year to continue bringing some Student Affairs practice to Medical Education.
I’m finally at a place where I have accepted that I dictate how I look at my situation and find ways to continue contributing to the field to ensure that my long-term career goals are met.
Siguimos para adelante
