CHOOSING THE RIGHT FRIENDS

Reinvent Yourself
Re-Invent Yourself
Published in
5 min readJun 5, 2017

Hey Re-inventors!

Today when I went to the gym to work out, I started wondering that I really do have only 2–3 “Friends” and how lucky I am to get these type of friends for they are so similar to me yet they are different!

We motivate and inspire each other, support each other through thick and thin and are always ready to help.

But…when I look around, I always see people who are hanging out with people who are not truly their friends, doing things they don’t want to, to impress others, to be a part of the group, to be accepted in some or the other manner.

Why was I lucky to get such a good circle of friends while sometimes, others are not?

Think about that…

What I mean by a “FRIEND”?

In this whole post, wherever I mention friend, I am not talking about Facebook friends or acquaintances or friends who you haven’t talked for years. I am talking about your CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE. People that have the power to make or break you and the power to affect you.

Clear? Let’s move ahead!

FIRST THINGS FIRST

Why should we think consciously about who is/are our friend(s)?

Answer : Because it affects everything we do. The way we react, the way we think, the way we perform both in our professional as well as personal life, the way we spend our time and money, the way we take risks, the way we set goals and what not. Whatever we achieve or lose in life is closely related to the type of friends we have.

They basically dictate how you live. Imagine this:

You are going through a very good day so far, your productivity is high, your tasks are complete, you can leave the office early and then go on a date with the love of your life. It’s noon and you are excited for the rest of the day. BUT THEN your negative friend calls you and then he tells about how he lost his TV remote and now he’ll not be able to see the NBA(and all the trivial shit) and the he goes on and on and you end up getting late to work and then your tasks pile up and all of a sudden you have to cancel your dinner and the “Perfect Day” gets ruined

This, my friends may seem far fetched but I have been in situations similar to this and I know how frustrating it gets.

The same thing has a positive side too. If you are going through a bad day, a call from your positive and optimistic friend can change the course of your day completely and turn your bad mood into a good one.

SO, I hope you understand the significance of your friends in you life.

Now, getting to the point, let’s see how you can make good friends:

1. Choose friends who have big goals and sense of purpose in life:

There is a reason behind this point. If you want to change your life for the good, you need to have such friends who are committed towards something and are working to accomplish their dreams and goals.

When you have friends who are not motivated and do not ave any goals in life, then you also become, like them.

Let’s take an example, suppose you have some work and want to finish it as soon as possible.

Then your friend(the unmotivated one) calls you to the bar to have a beer and then hook up with chicks. I bet that you may resist it for some time but eventually, with those types of friends you will fall to their request and go to the bar with them.

Now let’s suppose your friend(the motivated one) calls you and asks what you are doing. You tell him that you are working and he asks you how much work you have completed. You tell him that you have completed X amount of work and he says ”Only X ? I have done Y” AND then you are motivated to work harder.

Believe me guys, THIS IS HOW MY FRIENDS HAVE POSITIVELY INFLUENCED MY LIFE. Good friends always take you to the next level.

2. Choose friends that will be happy with your success:

Friends that are truly happy when you achieve something are precious.

If they are jealous, they are not your real friends and will soon leave you if they do not get any value from you.

3. Choose friends that have similar values:

Friends that have similar values really compliment your life. On a MACRO LEVEL they think the same as you and have same set of values.

However on the MICRO LEVEL, they may have different interests and hobbies and preferences and opinions and perspectives. Respect their opinion.

Choose friends that have similar values but different interests

4. There’s no need to change yourself to get a friend:

Many people make friends just for the sake of it. Having mentioned the impact of a friend on your life, I don’t think that you will be willing to choose the wrong friends in life.

If you do not appreciate the qualities of a person and you think that they may negatively impact your life, then don’t be friends with them.

Be YOU and you will get the right friend who will change your life. So wait for him or her

I hope this really helps you to look through all the drama going on in life and build a good support system that are always there to catch you if you fall.

Hit that green little heart if you like this to show some love!

Be happy and keep Re-inventing yourself!

CHEERS!

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