“The Couch is Closed”: Three Learnings from a Slasher
Reputation Lessons from a Life in Motion with Doug Melville
“Tell me about yourself.”
Thanks to Doug Melville, Global Head of DEI at Richemont, I’m rethinking how I answer that query. In an engaging lecture, Doug served up a tasting menu of tips for personal branding to the students of Reputation Management at the Stanford Graduate School of Business. His bite-sized lessons were paired with recipes too, or rather homework that can help you begin putting his tips into action.
Doug gave us a KPI from the lecture: To learn three things. I could probably list thirty that impacted me, but here are three things that stuck with me. Scroll down to find Doug’s complete list of tips and action items, and let me know what three resonate with you the most.
Number 1: Build Your Bridge
Companies can be disruptors in their industries, but what about individuals? Using the TBWA Disruption Roadmap, Doug implored us to think about how we are personal disruptors ourselves. So how do we read this roadmap?
- Convention: Everything everyone else is doing. Represented by a square for a reason, think of convention as everything that fits inside the box.
- Vision: Where do you want to go? Where do you see yourself? Peer through the circular lens of vision, and you’ll find the bullseye destination of your purpose in life.
- Disruption: This is the bridge that gets you from convention to vision. It’s what helps you think outside the box, breaks down the barriers, and lets you live your purpose.
What’s your disruption? It can be a tagline, a mantra, a work ethic, or something else entirely. However you capture it, you need to find ways to bring your disruption to the table to break yourself free and get to your vision.
Number 2: Discomfort Drives Growth
What do you do after driving the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile? I wouldn’t know, and neither did Doug. He questioned his path after landing a job as a tour manager, but during a phone call home, his father delivered a powerful lesson, saying, “The couch is closed.” There was no comfort to be had by going back, there was only the way forward. Because Doug didn’t retreat back to the safety of home, he was catapulted on a career’s worth of wild rides. From being Britney Spears’s manager to a red carpet company owner/entrepreneur to a global leader in DEI, Doug didn’t let discomfort get in the way of his growth.
Where’s your couch? What’s the shelter you go to when things get uncomfortable, and is it serving you? Something wonderful might happen if your couch is closed, too. Lean into discomfort, get comfortable with the uncomfortable, and see where life takes you next.
Number 3: Embrace Being a Slasher
Have you heard of a slasher? Doug defines it as people who are good at many things at the same time. Also known as multi-hyphenates, there’s power in knowing all the different perspectives you bring to the table.
But beyond just being a slasher, you need to know how to communicate your story. Knowing who you are and where you come from are both crucial to finding your purpose, but to be a successful leader, you need to fine tune your narrative to win people over.
What are your slashes? What paths has your journey taken you down? Somewhere in your slashes lies your strengths, all the superpowers that make you uniquely you.
Here are some of my slashes: Medievalist by training, museumist by trade. Serial hobbyist with more projects than time. Communicator with a drive to dig into data. MBA student building her bridge. According to HowManyOfMe.com, there are 14 Isabel Heberts in the United States today, but thanks to Doug, I’m starting to find ways to find my disruption, lean into discomfort, and tell my story.
Bonus: Doug Melville’s 7 Lessons in Reputation Management + Homework to Get Started
What did you learn from Doug? In case you need a refresher, here are his 7 tips for reputation management (plus a bonus!) along with his tactical assignments to get started building yours.
Tip #1: Prove trust and consistency
Homework: Make a personal blog. It shows your dedication through consistent posts, showcases your voice and creative point of view, and helps readers get to know you and build trust with them.
Tip #2: Your reputation is the only thing that precedes you when you walk into a room
Homework: Open a private browser and Google yourself. The first 10 things are what people know about you before they meet you.
Tip #3: Know the people you are with every day
Homework: Put a coffee chat on someone’s calendar. Set up a lunch with that person you sit next to who you don’t really know. Spend time getting to know each other, and you never know where those connections will take you.
Tip #4: You pay for what you don’t know
Homework: Master the dinner party conversation. Set Google alerts for the #1 brands and the industries you want to work in. Read and be ridiculously topical. If you can talk about NFTs and traditional media at your next dinner party, you’ve done Doug proud!
Tip #5: Focus on your strengths, not your weaknesses
Homework: Make your own personal SWOT analysis. Learn how to master your craft. Define and know your own superpower.
Tip #6: Know how to tell your story
Homework: Start practicing how you tell your story. Master it in 30 seconds, 3 minutes, and 15 minutes.
Tip #7: Be comfortable with the uncomfortable
Homework: Be a continual learner. Go where you’re celebrated, not where you’re tolerated.
Bonus Tip #8: Find and live your purpose
Homework: Go back into your family story. Think about your purpose and find the answer to “why you do what you do.” Clear your mind, take some time, and you’ll get there.
Final Homework Assignment: Find three people to have in your corner
- A Mentor: Your North Star, someone to keep you on track, striving towards your purpose and aligning your actions with your values.
- An Advocate: Someone who works in your industry who can tell you how to move forward and climb the ladder.
- A Coach: Your biggest cheerleader, the person who wipes the sweat off your face, encourages you, and pushes you back out into the ring.
