Furthest Left On This Bigass Table

Larenz Brown
Dec 6, 2019 · 4 min read

“Scientists” say that urban seagulls and rural seagulls

(‘rural’ for seagulls means they live by water

which is weird because ‘rural’ for humans

means they live by land and corn)

have become so distinct that they rarely interact

and soon will become completely different species.

What if seagulls aren’t even real?

I could see a world

where white-winged surveillance robots

get sent by somebody with big plans.

The eyes already look like little beady secret cameras.

Once I went to a KGB museum

and you’d be shocked at all the ways they concealed cameras,

knives, guns, and niacin pills.

You can lose a lot of wars with these items tucked beneath the crown

of your hardest-to-reach molar.

I wonder all the time what it’d be like to have hollow bones

because flying means nothing if your arm breaks

when someone greets you.

I’d hate for webbed toes to be my redeeming quality.

Anything shared between a frog and a bird is really quite strange.

What if I too could drink water through my skin?

I watched the shape of water once on a nice date

with a bad person

at a nice theater

w/ full service, free popcorn, and scratchy ass blankets.

I watched it bootleg the next day

because I felt bad about being excessive.

I also know someone who can turn a bathroom into a swimming pool

(just like that)

that can turn a phone into a magnifying glass

(just like that).

(Uffff she’s so good at distraction.)

Would it be useful to drink through the skin?

I feel like it would be so easy to get poisoned.

Conversely, I feel like I’d poison people all the time.

Imagine if every instance in your life

someone spilled something on you,

you automatically had to drink that thing,

wouldn’t that be terrible?

“Sometimes things are just terrible”

I said to a late bloomer to pessimism

as she sat on the edge of my bed.

She wore a face like she’d never thought of that before

and I was equal parts enamored and jealous.

“I’ve never thought of that before”

she said.

I smile(d) in space-time.

“Don’t laugh at me!”

I had no idea I was laughing

(I probably wasn’t laughing)

Some people hold their opinions in baskets

made of swiss cheese

(baskets already have holes)

and opinions only come in liquid

and gaseous forms anyway.

When I was growing up I always heard these jokes

about underwater basket weaving

and I swear to god i never understood a single one.

I think there are a lot of jokes

that everyone pretends to love.

I think people feel like having

a misaligned sense of humor

makes it seem like

they’re not well-adjusted.


(laughs in maniac)

If one of your legs is shorter than the other

you’ll adjust with custom shoes.

If your shoes aren’t well adjusted

you might fuck around and end up

with some blisters.

If you can’t adjust your sense of self

in the context of the rest of the billions

there are lots and lots

of books about your not-so-happy ending.

If I work my whole life I’ll probably die.

(I hate formal affairs)

But I do think there are people who won’t.

I think we’ll have a reliable way to transfer form

so anyone can be anything

like a robot or a donut

or a stupid dumbass seagull.

Resistance Poetry

Verse as Commentary

Larenz Brown

Written by

New York, NY larenzb@gmail.com

Resistance Poetry

Verse as Commentary

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