The very vein they stuck the IV needle into is the same vein that carries blood to my brain which tells me this hurts, which in turn tells my mouth to say “Ouch!” and my leg to kick out. (That’s why they stand at your side so you can’t punch or kick them!) They told me I would feel a little sting, not that the whole Russian Army would be digging trenches and foxholes in my arm! Then they stick a Flintstones band aid on it and tell me what a good kid I was. Ha! Sugar Coat!
Then, there’s the time, I called my insurance agent to tell them I had just crashed the car and had major injuries in the hospital. She laughed at me. She said she was having a bad day but that it cheered her up just knowing someone else was having a worse day. She even congratulated me, saying that now she would get her bonus just because I had a wreck. Immediately, wanted a customer survey completed so she can advance in the customer service competition. Then she tried to sell me some more insurance. Finally, she said, “Go ahead and tell me about the wreck, not that it matters anyway.” This time I sugar-coated the story.
The ugliest, poorest and stupidest girl in the whole county with the lowest set of morals and ethics, came to town wearing the most outrageous, the most outlandish and the most ridiculous outfit. She stank, she spit, she twerked, she growled, hissed, snorted and grunted throughout the dance, offending anyone who came near her rancid smelling body. I am sugar-coating this. It was much worse. Some things you just can’t sugarcoat.
The preacher came on a Tuesday for dinner. He had a big appetite and low attitude. He had not one encouraging, uplifting or positive thing to say other than, “Father, we are miserable and getting worse. We would ask that you have mercy on us.” He even said he wasn’t satisfied with the food but was grateful to get some nourishment. He said he looked forward to eating tomorrow at the Albertson’s because they made Banana Pudding. He said he probably won’t be back because of his busy schedule but that the food was delicious. He was sugar-coating the experience.
He beat the crap out of her. He slammed her against the car and raped her on the dark country toad. No one heard her cries and sobs. He slapped her when he was done and told her she was no good. She went to the church social the next evening and told everyone what a wonderful husband and family she had. He went to work the next day telling the guys what a sweet little wifey he had at home. They sugar-coated life.
The family would brag on little Jimmy when they would meet friends or neighbors. They’d tell them how good he was doing away at college. How he was on the dean’s list. They didn’t tell them that he was on the dean’s shit list for destroying school property, inciting a riot, gross irresponsibility, getting arrested and resisting arrest for breaking into the administration building and spraying it all down with vegetable oil. They didn’t say that he had been arrested for DUI, public intoxication and child molesting. They didn’t say that he was doing weekends in jail for being a peeping tom. They told them their son was a model kid away at university. They sugar-coated the truth.
I was born naked, cold, crying, screaming, in shock, cold and wet. I’ll probably go out of this world and die in a similar fashion. I can say that in between it has been a wonderful experience and that life has been a delight. I have experienced the most awesome highs a person can have along with a few lows. The highs, when my son was born, when my granddaughter was born, when my parents came to visit my home, when I found the love of my life, when I stood up for myself, when I accepted life on it’s terms, when I finally understood just who God is. I confess, I sugar-coat this story. It was shocking, still is, still much worse in many ways than I envisioned. Without being specific, because I know all my readers have personal issues also, I want to say that many aspects of life are miserable, frightening, alarming, disturbing and downright scary. The pain of everyday living can become unbearable. The overwhelming awe can debilitate one.
By all means, sugar-coat everything! At least it makes us feel better!