The 10 Worst Resumes the Employers Have Ever Seen

When looking for a job, most people do everything they can to make their resume outstanding. Certain people’s resumes really do stand out — but because how bad they are.

Recruiting managers often have to fight back tears of laughter (or despair?) going through applicants’ resumes. In some instances, it is almost hard to believe that the person had the guts to send it. Since the recruiter can’t see the job candidate in person, one should try and make the best impression, both with resume content and its design. However, some people’s word choices and their visual taste are way beyond our imagination.

Like we said in our 10 resume tips that will help you get hired, you should never lie on your resume. Although, in some cases, lying would probably be a better option.

Here’s our selection of resumes that went terribly wrong. So, if you’re currently looking for a job, make sure your resume doesn’t come close to any of the following:

(And just for the record: No, this is no joke. These were ACTUALLY submitted for job openings).

1. An overly self-confident guy who’s obviously an underrated genius. We guess all of his references caught fire while he was burning the midnight oil. And a big thumbs up for his university choices!

Source: Imgur

2. This guy obviously underestimated the importance of a spell check. He didn’t plan to apply for a job as a cock, we presume.

Source: Buzzfeed

3. Losing virginity is, without doubt, a very important milestone in one’s life. Only we’re not sure if it’s appropriate to state it on your resume.

Source: The Blubber

4. This guy who got stuck in the 90s and has a very special taste for fonts and accompanying pictures. Or what if the resume really was written by a monkey? Awwww yeah!

Source: Imgur

5. Some people think a brutal honesty is the best policy. In this case, it isn’t. But at least, he’s learned his lesson.

Source: Imgur

6. Once a gangsta, always a gangsta. Not quite sure whether “I want dat straight up money in my hand ya hurd” is the type of statement that would get you a job. But keep trying to make it in this rap game, mate!

Source: Imgur

7. Nobody told this lady that a resume shouldn’t be a showcase of one’s favorite colors. Or fonts. Or clip arts. But maybe if the recruiter printed it out in B&W? No, that wouldn’t help either.

Source: Business Insider

8. Umm, is this guy for real? His little kinky resume looks as though written after consuming certain psychotropic substances. We’re wondering what did the little pony do next.

Source: Huffingtonpost

9. There’s relevant experience and skills and then there’s experience and skills that is, well, not that relevant. At least he emits pleasant aromas!

Source: Imgur

10. Now that’s what we call being straightforward. This person knows that when it comes to words, not a single one ought to be wasted. Although, he or she could have spared one or two of those “good” things about them.

Source: Imgur

With Kickresume, your resume will never be an epic fail. So, after you stop laughing, create your amazing resume.

Originally published at blog.kickresume.com on March 21, 2016.