#BigParentingIdea — Do This And You’ll Have Done More Than 99% Of Parents In This World
Whether you follow your calling/ passion, or work a regular job trying to find the right work life balance, with your daily actions, habits and attitudes you validate a certain approach to life.
You can’t fake who you really are and what kind of lifestyle you have chosen for yourself (and your family).
You can only “advertise” your own lifestyle to your kid and that’s what most parents do, whether they like it or not. Whether they’re aware of it or not.
We all sell them on our version of reality. That’s fairly reasonable. After all how are we supposed to sell them (or anybody) on something we never tried? What reason would they have to believe us?
The one thing is certain though. They watch us, and in the majority of cases our lifestyle becomes more or less their lifestyle. Sure there will be some differences, mostly because of the difference in disposable income, but the model of life (or life philosophy) tends to be very similar.
If the parents went to college to get a degree, so that they could find a good job after graduation and have this nice middle class family life until retirement (with nice cars, house, dog, prestige, friends with similar lifestyle and philosophy), or such was always their dream, chances are rather high that their child will subscribe to the same model.
The chances that he will suddenly become a modern nomad (with only one bag of clothes and no permanent address) or that he will be a struggling artist who doesn’t get the idea of retiring, or that at the age of 14 she will want to solo sail around the world, are pretty small.
And vice versa, it’s hard to imagine that Laura Dekker who actually did sail solo around the world between ages 14 and 16, would choose this conventional middle class family life after growing up with her dad whose great passion was (you guessed it) sailing.
Either way, the best thing we can do as parents is show our kids both paths and let them make their own choices.
Encouraging them to subscribe to one model or the other is always risky. We can quickly become emotional and even damage our relationship with the kid. After all we all tend to prefer our own choices. We like to think that we actually did figure it out. That our path was the right one.
If we choose to steer our kid toward a certain choice (advocate in favor of it), even when we think it’s the best choice one can make, we’re taking the freedom of choice away from them by telling them what they should do.
And nobody likes when you tell him/ her what to do.
Leave it up to your kid.
You’ll have done more than 99% of parents in this world if you show her that the way you live your life is just one possibility, that there are myriad ways to be happy/ myriad ways to succeed/ myriad ways to live your life.
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