I Am Learning To Be Real
The essential lesson I’ve learned in life is to just be yourself. Treasure the magnificent being that you are and recognize first and foremost you’re not here as a human being only. You’re a spiritual being having a human experience.
The Real Me.
Maybe life isn’t about learning to be happy, but learning to be real. And through that comes happiness.
So often our search for happiness seems to take us away from our true self.
We search for happiness in objects, activities, people, status, etc… We tend to mold ourselves into being a certain person: to get the job, to be with the person, to be seen as successful, etc… And so we can forget, lose, and/or deny our true self in the process.
I have caught myself doing this many times. I get sucked into what seems like the easiest, most socially acceptable, most fun version of me for a spell. Then something in me speaks up, “Wait this is not what I am about!”. And I feel like I am David Byrne singing, ‘This is not my beautiful house, this is not my beautiful wife…’ . And I have to realign and check in.
I have to ask myself what are my biggest priorities? What do I want out of my life? I have to remember to look inside.
And honestly, if you really want to know what I want, here it is. I want to be enlightened. I want to shed all my layers of judgement, separation, friction, confusion, and sickness. And I want to fully realize my oneness with god. My expansive self as love. And merge back into the infinite.
And I want to do this through having a fun, interesting, open, loving, centered, and grounded life.
I want to do this through living in the world, not separate from (because that seems backwards for me).
This is my real self. One that most who know me don’t really know much about. And that is the self that is so easily pushed aside. Not acknowledged. Hidden. Thought about only in private or with certain people.
So maybe it is time to declare myself to everyone. Come out of the closet. Share my true self with the world. Be real. And who knows maybe this will unlock another pathway to true happiness.
So ladies and gents, full disclosure: I think about god (a lot). I actively practice forgiveness. I meditate every day (almost). I sing bhajans (sanskrit devotional songs). I have a guru (and have since I was 13). And I do all of this because I can feel it bringing me closer to what I truly want.
What do you want? Who are you when you are being totally honest? (And why is it so hard to share what it is that we want most?)
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