Dial 1–800-REALITY for Sandusky’s innocence…or Gay Men

Former Penn State coach Jerry Sandusky’s lawyer might be the worst. First, he sat inches away from Bob Costas as his client struggled to answer if he “was attracted to young boys.” Then, the stories of Amendola impregnating a 17 year-old girl when he was 49 hit the press. Now, attorney Joe Amendola latest gaffe happened in the video above after Sandusky waived the right to a preliminary hearing and go straight to trial.

“Anyone who is naive enough to think for a minute that Tim Curley, Joe Paterno and Gary Schultz and, for that matter, Graham Spanier, the university president, were told by Mike McQueary that he observed Jerry Sandusky having anal sex with a 10-year-old-looking kid in a shower at Penn State or Penn State property and their response was to simply tell Jerry Sandusky that, ‘Don’t go in the shower room any more with kids.’ I suggest you dial 1–800-REALITY. Because that makes absolutely no sense.”

Well, it turns out the 1–800-REALITY is a “gay, bi, and bi-curious hotline.”

Really?

For someone who tells internet jokes for a living, let me give you some advice Joe. 800 number jokes only work if they are obscenely long AND don’t already exist. For example, for people who think Jerry Sandusky is innocent I would wonder if they had 1–800-MOLESTINGKIDS4LIFE programmed in their speed dial. See how easy that is?! Or for people who want Joe Amendola’s lawyer services, I would suggest they call 1–800-NOCHANCEOFWINNING. Zing!

The only satisfaction that I’m getting out of this whole Sandusky ordeal is the fact that his lawyer just keeps making one mistake after another. It almost guarantees that there will be no way that Sandusky will be able to wiggle his way out of a guilty verdict!

In fact, with the way this clown show has been unfolding, I wouldn’t be surprised if Amendola has Sandusky take the stand.

Deadspin.com had first reported to give the 800 number a call.

However, it seems like the line has now been disconnected as our repeated attempts to confirm the message and the validity of the phone line have ended in failed calls (or this has been a great goof put together by Deadspin).