I’m Pretty Sure Santa is on Steroids

As I woke up early on Christmas morning to see what Santa brought me, I started to wonder how in the hell he could manage to give out presents to over 4 billion homes in just one night. I remember growing up, Santa would over perform so much on Christmas morning that even my Jewish friends ended up with presents from Santa.

And I hate to be the one to call him out on this, but is there really any explanation out there except for performance enhancing drugs.

At his age, how does he still perform as well as he did hundreds of years ago.

Santa we are investigating!

Merry Christmas Everyone!