Lamas and Tormas and chang, oh my!
I have finally had the opportunity to replenish my energy. I was extremely tired since before my last blog. My time preparing medicine and rituals for the next village, and then spending days there helping and healing took all my energy. Soon after I wrote the blog, I sat in stillness for some time (a benefit to living so far from everyone else), meditating and experiencing emptiness as well as reflecting on my work in the last village. I also made sure to put some of my patients from that village in my mind so I could continue to send them compassion for a quick path to health.
One I regained my energy I went for a walk about our village, said hello to some friends and observed the re-building of some of the houses that were damaged in the hail storm. As well, I went by the monastery where some of our important religious documents were damaged. Seeing this is quite inauspicious and scares me a little bit. I am keeping my eyes and ears open for anything else that might happen in the near future although with the Lama coming I am confident that all will be well. Personally, I am very excited to see the Lama. I will in fact be making Torma for him the day before he arrives. Torma, for those who do not know Tibetan custom, are special cakes made from flour and butter which we use in many circumstances. I will be making offering tormas for the deities that will bring our village merit when the Lama arrives. As well, I will make these special cakes for the Lama himself in order to be a part of the rituals that will occur when he arrives. Mmmmm, tormas. I have fond childhood memories of making torma with my family, a long time ago. They are precious to me and bring me strong, peaceful feelings when times like these arise. My earliest memory of this is when I was 6. I was with my mother, and my older sister and all three of us were baking and eating and laughing. I even threw a torma at my sister and it stuck to her back. I had a wonderful relationship with them.
Besides the torma and the Lama’s visit, I have been quite busy. I believe I mentioned that I went for a walk through my village, as I was walking near where the new medical facility will be built, I ran into a fellow amchi and friend Kaivalia. She was not feeling very well at all. She invited me back to her home, we drank butter tea, and she let me know that she’s been having great difficulties with memory loss and nightmares. As I listened intently to her, I worked to hear the words and feelings that lay in between her storytelling. After some questions, she told me that she is in a terrible state of grief. I promised then that I would search for a ritual to help her come to acceptance over the death of that person who was so close to her. At the absolute level in Buddhism, as a Tibetan I understand that death is never truly death but that we are all reborn, destined towards the next life by our karma. But at the relative level of existence, death is not so easy to comprehend. One still loses someone close to them and it is painful. Always painful. I can definitely relate. I left my friend to ruminate in her darkness while I searched for a way to bring back her light.
Another joyous moment while preparing for the Lama was when Britany came to me in order for me to show her how to help build a mandala. Since I am only secondary in ritualism I had to do some research in order to remember how to prepare the mandala offering. It was in fact quite fun. She came by my cave, we drank chang and searched through my manuals, while at the same time practicing the mandala offer. It is good to have good friends in town. Sometimes I wonder if I should move into town to be closer to people. Although, as my practice deepens my loneliness lessens. I open more to the world around me and feel ever connected.
On another note, I have been talking with local traders in order to refill my stores of medicine. After the hailstorm much of my herbs and minerals were damaged and mostly unusable. I spoke with two local traders and was able to bargain them down to 12 gold for 10 lbs of product. This is quite an amazing deal. But I did promise them that I will talk with the other doctors at the medical facility. If they can continue offering such good prices and as good a quality of product as they gave me, then I will surely help them be our go-to traders for the medical facility.
Speaking about the medical facility, it is about time that it gets built! If our town suffers through another plague (such as the one from 15 years ago) or receives as many injured as we did during the hailstorm, we need that medical facility in order to ensure we always have lots of medicine and bandages and amulets available. I told them that I can work one day a week there, since I mostly prefer to be a house doctor and go to patients directly. Also, I enjoy keeping my schedule sporadic so I have time for my tantric practices.
There is so much more to prepare for the Lama’s visit, so I will depart for now. May you be well, may you be happy, may you be free from suffering.
