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These Songs Are the Only Thing I Like About the Cold
A Texan’s lament Rate-A-Record
I may have mentioned before that I am a native Texan. What I may not have mentioned is that for my entire 59 years (as of this coming Tuesday), I have never lived north of South Carolina: three years in Arizona, four years in Georgia, and the rest in the Great State of Texas. What this means, at least for the purposes of this story, is that I believe any temperature below 60 degrees should be confined to Canada, Scandinavia, Russia, and the Arctic circle. And before my readers in Chicago, Boston, and Boise start commenting, understand that I consider any state north of Virginia to be part of Canada.
Texas can be quite schizophrenic, weather-wise; a week ago we had snow, followed by several days near 70 degrees, and we’re about to get pummeled with a polar blast that will have wind chills near ten degrees. Ten degrees is the temperature you chill vodka at, not something you walk outside in. I expect to see moose and penguins walking past my window any time now.
The biggest issue with this latest cold front isn’t our typical ice storm that is inevitably followed by school closures, massive traffic problems, and a failed power grid lasting weeks past the storm. The biggest problem for the next few days is that the local news channels are devoting half of…