Stephan (Steph), Male, Sophomore, 20 Years Old, Lives Off Campus.
Length of Interview
Steph lives in a four bedroom, two bathroom house with five other guys. Two of the bedrooms are shared and two are not. The ones that share the bedrooms pay less rent than the two that do not, and everyone thinks that it is fair based on the room sizes and what not. This is Steph’s first year in the house and he is one of the people in the shared rooms. Steph and one other guy joined an already existing house with four of their friends. So far Steph has really enjoyed living off campus. He lived in the dorms last year, and although the house gets a little cramped at times, he likes all of his roommates so it never really bothers him.
Steph only knew one of his roommates before college. The one he knew he lived in the dorms with, and he met the rest through his dorm roommate. Steph says the only reason they all ended up living together this year is because they could not find a place in time, and everywhere was filling up fast. The four guys that already had a house threw it out as a suggestion and it just kind of worked out in a weird way. So far, everyone seems happy with the current arrangement. Steph going in to this year only had a good relationship with his roommate from the dorms but had hung out with the other guys enough that it was not weird to move in with them.
His dorm roommate knew two of the guys from his hometown and that is how they all became affiliated. He said he was a little uncomfortable at the beginning of the year because he did not have that close relationship with these four guys that have known each other since their freshman year. But he said after a week or two he felt so comfortable, respected, and included that this fit worked out better than a lot of possibilities would have worked out.
Relationship wise, Steph said the house has no real drama. He does get annoyed about dirty dishes and things like that, but things could be worse. He also said there are a lot of inside jokes and fake drama that they all just laugh and bullshit about but no one really cares about. He thinks that makes the house more fun and part of the reason he likes living where he does.
Steph said that him and his roommates do a lot of things and spend lots of time together. He does have a couple different friend groups that he spends time with, but he never feels like he’s ditching his roommates for them, or would rather be with them. He just likes to see his other friends from time to time.
One of Steph’s favorite things to do with his roommates is just sit around and bullshit. Three of the guys have roommates and he respects that, but when all six of them are home just sitting in the living room, cracking jokes, and making fun of each other are some of the times he will never forget. He has never met people like the ones he lives with in that they all get along extremely well and NEVER fight. Not once has there been a heated debate or argument that was serious.
What does it mean to be close and to trust your roommates?
I asked Steph if he was close with his roommates and if he trusted his roommates, and what being close and trust meant to him.
What being close means to Steph is that he could be personal around each of his roommates and it would not feel uncomfortable. He said at the beginning of the year he would have said he was not close with all of his roommates, but he without a doubt is close with all of them now.
Trust to Steph means he knows his roommates will not take or vandalize his stuff and he does not have to hide or lock anything away. In terms of emotional trust, Steph related that with closeness. He said there is a comfort level there that allows him to trust his roommate’s word, regularly.
“You never know if things are going to work out for you. I took a risk living with these guys that I did not have a great relationship with going in, and it turned out to be one of the best risks I have ever taken.”