I was an Over-The-Road Trucker
Alabama — Birmingham, Busy narrow freeway. Keep it moving. Moundville is where the mothership landed and rescued the inhabitants. An archaeological Native American site complete with large mounds (Launch pads.) There is also a biodiesel refinery plant there.(Mothership Fuel)
- Alaska — — TBA (To be announced)(I worked for a guy who flew to Kodiak. He installed a telephone system on the island.)
*Arizona — — Nogales, Phoenix, Twenty-Nine Palms Free Breakfast w/fill-up. Quartzite has a rock festival.. that is.. they sell rocks… 1,000’s of RVers. Outdoor vending machines are refrigerated so the candy bars won’t melt and there are little signs on them that say be careful reaching into machine because there might be a reptile inside.
*Arkansas — — West Memphis Truckstop, go in to pay for fuel, robbed, CB, all. There are rice paddies in the fields. There are catfish farms. There are whole towns built around the sport of duck hunting.
*California — — Pulling back on LA Freeway on-ramp sideswiped, took mirror. Coming down the ‘Grapevine’ on I-5 at Mount Shasta I experienced vertigo and fear at seventy miles an hour coming down the mountain. I pulled over and said ‘I can’t do this anymore.’ and I gave the wheel to my partner who woke up from the sleeper. He did not understand the magnetism, the powerful pull. Glad I stopped.
*Colorado — — Had to chain-up tires at the top of mountain pass or refused entry. Denver has big truckstops. Wonderful mountain air. Be careful around water falls. I almost fell to my death, saved by my toenails and fingernails as I started slipping off the mossy rock ten stories above the white water crashing on the jagged rocks. Lucky dude! But it was worth the picture that I have since lost.
*Connecticut — — Had to park in center of street domino of trucks no parking lots available and the police directed us. Slept there.
*Delaware — Nice rest areas with modern conveniences and great bars.
*Florida — — Easy to keep a truck clean. Many good places to stop. Food great! Tallahassee had the biggest prom night street presence I’ve ever seen.
*Georgia — — Atlanta is hub all revolves around. Respect Atlanta Don’t Play. Peachtree Street will get you some fun, almost got cornered and robbed, ducked out at the last minute and drug dealers were on the street soliciting wearing suits with briefcases. Sensei? He whispered.
*Hawaii — — TBA (To Be Announced)(I met an Hawaiian Family in California)
*Idaho — — Remote privacy with a diverse assortment of universal residents.
*Illinois — — Chicago and all that comes wit it. Colleges, Universities, Bars, Portillo’s Hot Dogs, Big Al’s Italian Roast Beef, Spending days in the Ryerson-Tull truck lot waiting for a load back South. Usually a load of steel rolls (coils on a flatbed trailer semi big rig) to Herrin, Ill. to the Maytag Washing machine factory.
- *Indiana — — Turkey Run State Park. The old-timers play spoons bluegrass
*Iowa — -Cedar Rapids was happening. Art Nouveau, kool cats and some wicked chicks with cars and gasoline.
*Kansas — — Manhattan, Lawrence, sexy video girls, very eager actresses wanting auditions at the truckstop. Long way between towns and mountains in Colorado take hours of driving to get bigger. Trees, rare.
*Kentucky — Crazy drivers in Owensboro, white fences, stone walls and green bluegrass in Lexington, steep grade past Natural Bridge to Pikeville(pronounced Pack-vul.), coal dust, slaw burgers, fries and bottle of Ski. Poor live large, rich live small, me? All 4 largest cities, Louisville, Lexington, Bowling Green, Owensboro. The Newport area near Cincinnati, Ohio is very populated as well. Narrow roads, mountains to pastures and very woodsy in between.
*Louisiana — Fatback at convenience stores, long bridges over swamps, red beans and rice, jazz, blues, boogalou, barbeque, an attitude of “How do you do?”
*Maine — Where a headlight is a lighthouse, where swat teams act and then think, where people think they live in a sweater, rubber boots and a rain slicker, going around checking lobster traps and looking for buckets of clams.
*Maryland — Expensive overweight toll booth scale tickets but nice rest areas.
*Massachusetts — I never could communicate with those people. They were in another world that they didn’t like. They didn’t seem to want me in their world. I didn’t want to be in that world and I wasn’t for very long.
*Michigan — If I remember correctly, mostly rude annoying people, almost as bad as Cleveland, Ohio. Almost. I can say two good things for Michigan. One, I’m not there and two, pasties. I like pasties when I’m there.(pronounced “paaah -steeees”, a food item like a pot pie folded in half, originated as a food item, they would stay hot for hours. First made for underground miners.)
*Minnesota — A favorite of mine. I like 10,000 lakes and ice fishing in the little shacks out on the ice. It’s not about fishing, you know and the hole in the ice has a dual function. The best part? The beer is on ice.
*Mississippi — Favorite towns, Coldwater and Senatobia. I sold my bosses soul to the devil at the crossroads in Clarksdale. That’s where I picked up my first blues rock. Now I sell “Blues Rocks” for $5 each from the site.
*Missouri — Still looking for that injun Chief Wilson. Stood under the arch, saw where “Popeye” was from and got married to a teen as a teen a long time ago.
*Montana — A harsh environment, a gentle feeling, a masculine place with strong looking women. Beautiful skies and clean air. Fresh, cool, clear water.
*Nebraska — Underground nightclubs, convenient store whores, farmers and drugs. Really good radio stations. Really friendly people.
*Nevada — In Las Vegas, The Gold Coast Casino has truck parking. The whorehouses in the desert have landing strips for planes and the brothels are house trailers with luxury autos in the driveway. I bought a T-Shirt. I had the privilege to drive over Hoover Dam before trucks were banned after 9-11, 2001.
*New Hampshire — Yup, been there. History is thick in the air. Friendly people.
*New Jersey — Rudest toll booth attendants! “Is this Hwy ??”, “Keep it movin’ mac!”
*New Mexico — Big boulders that look like animals. Lizards in the vending machines. It feels new but is old. The air is full of something, not sure what.
*New York — Built on bedrock, taxes are high, mental health is poor, egos are huge. There is Roosevelt Island in New York City with a lighthouse on it’s point, built by a mad man who lived in the asylum.
*North Carolina — I was treated like a racist by blacks, whites and browns. The police wanted to arrest me for something, but they couldn’t put their finger on what it was. I thought there were very many ‘Biscuit’ restaurants. I also thought the sausage was way too greasy. I could almost understand the language in ‘Nawth Caah — Lie Nah.’
*North Dakota — Two good roads, one North and South and one East and West, the rest are gravel, gave some elderly drunk native americans a ride home from their car wreck in the snow on the reservation and when I dropped them at home, they said you better get out of here before the neighbors kill you.
*Ohio — Don’t go to Cleveland, go to Cincinnati, nice underground caverns near Columbus, state troopers are Nazis, and both kinds of Chili are good.
*Oklahoma — Hotels catch on fire but you can stay there anyway once it’s put out. You can buy nice turquoise and silver jewelry on the roadside from Native Americans.
*Oregon — Nice waterfalls and the last hill you pop over nearing the coast, you can smell the ocean air! You are not allowed to pump your own gasoline. They said they are afraid you’ll spill it or top off the tank, which you are not supposed to do, supposedly.
*Pennsylvania —Some call it Pennsyltucky… Backwards in a cocky sort of way, pretty much a screw you and everything else too attitude, lovely parks and beautiful hilly pastures. Then there are the ‘proud of their heritage’ sect in the Eastern Part who are socially ranked higher than truck drivers. My favorite part of the state is Pittsburgh, where my beautiful granddaughter is being raised by two lovely parents. Primanti’s is the shiznitz. http://www.primantibros.com/
*Rhode Island — Yes, it is there and signage is tremendous. They want you to know you’ve been there. They want you to stop and spend money.
*South Carolina — Scary. That accent is drawl that will make you bawl.
*South Dakota — College kids are fun to hang with there. They like outdoors.
*Tennessee — There is no “out in the country” left. It’s all “city woods” now.
*Texas — Whole nuther country. Should be called The Republic of Texas.
*Utah — Very far between any two places there. You should like to walk or drive a lot.
*Vermont — Everyone is stoned. I think it must be an unspoken rule.
*Virginia — Pretty place for lovers but I didn’t see any. Very old and green.
*Washington — Most serious people I ever met. Sort of like, “We’re busy doing what we don’t want to do, so don’t interrupt.”
*West Virginia — Good hillside builders, coal, railroad tracks, Jesuits and beer.
*Wisconsin — Craziest people on Earth. They will drive all day for a stinky treat. The students will riot at the drop of a hat and the Dells are happening!
*Wyoming — Miles and miles of miles and miles. The trick? Stop and enjoy stillness. There are signs, a strict Police warning to would be gas station ’drive-offs’, “If you steal gas, we will catch you before you get to the State Line.” It could be hundreds of miles to the state line, but they will catch you.