The United States didn’t even notice
THE FRICKIN’ MADNESS — In the Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo, Mexico ceded what are now the states of California, Nevada, Utah, New Mexico, Texas, Colorado, Arizona as well as parts of Wyoming, Kansas, and Oklahoma to the United States.
Needless to say, Mexico was devastated. It felt like a failure. He drank two shots of tequila and smiled because, at least, the Spanish-speaking country had now a real relationship with the world’s favorite country: The United States of America.
But that did not work out. The U.S. ghosted and gaslighted Mexico several times until they decided to go separate ways.
Now, with the US getting out of control, and with all the attention going to the Capitol situation, Mexico seized the opportunity and got some of its lost territories back.
Mexico sent its troops to the border of New Mexico and started from there. There was no resistance: New Mexico willingly gave itself in and is now part of the Mexican republic once again.
“I guess you can say I’m a New Mexican now!” New Mexico joked. Mexico almost regretted it.
They continued their journey; they took over Arizona and California which welcomed Mexico eagerly.
“I knew you’d come back for me one day,” California said endearingly to Mexico.
“This was my first home. I’m so happy!” Arizona manifested.
“What about me?” Texas asked. Mexico ignored it.
Mexico has stopped the conquest for now, but it’s hoping for another disturbance (maybe a more pacific one) so it can annex the rest of what was lost. Maybe even more.
“Except the cabrones of Texas,” Mexico concluded.