Blog Post #6: Revise don’t Edit
However, when speaking with other college students on campus, this sleep schedule seems quite favorable compared to some others. It is not unheard of for students to pull all-nighters multiple times a month in order to accomplish the work in their complete the work from their course load. But what is behind this lack of sleep and how it has become the social norm? It seems that sleep has taken a backseat to getting good grades in the lives of college students. A belief among students is that if they have enough caffeine and take short naps they will be able to get through the day. A common mindset among students can be just to get through the week and then catch up on rest on the weekends. In most of my research I discovered an abundance of negative effects and consequences that digital technology contributes, but there have been little to no instances on what can be done to solve this issue and use this technology become more of an asset rather than a burden.
Even though getting less than 7 hours a sleep on average would make it extremely difficult to function, a good percentage of college students would trade their average sleep for the amount that I stated. If someone is wondering how this could be, other students told me when they are usually staying up until at night during the week. The reason for staying up late during the week isn’t usually because of people having fun or hanging out, at least not past a certain time at night. these late weeknights are usually reserved for finishing up homework or catching up on assignments with close deadlines. Even while taking a full course load, I don’t understand why a student wouldn’t reserve more time for projects and assignments during the day in order to not have to leave everything for late hours of the night. From my experience, if I am doing work past midnight I get the feeling that my brain isn’t working as efficiently which can then affect the product. However, when students procrastinate and leave assignments until the night before they are due, there isn’t really much of a choice to get a good nights sleep if they are looking to get an acceptable grade. It happens all too often as we see that the concern for receiving good grades will take a backseat to sleep in most cases, even if the student doesn’t procrastinate. The vibe that I have picked up around campus is that a student just needs to live off of caffeine and short naps during the day instead of getting a consistent sufficient 7 or 8 hours of sleep per night. I feel like this culture of lack of sleep in college students has been exponentially growing in relation to the progression of digital technology. These technologies can serve as a distraction and can contribute to a student not being as efficient during the day in accomplishing necessary tasks. It can be seen that digital technology can have more of a negative effect on sleep patterns whether it be directly or indirectly.
The strategy that I took in revising this paragraph was trying to make the sentences and different ideas flow easier from one to another. It required restructuring some of the ideas by changing the sentences and how I got my point across. I fine-tuned some of the points and put some more of my own personal experience in the revision so it can give the audience some examples to relate to. These examples are everyday issues for college students and so it really answers the “so what” in this paragraph of why people should continue to read the rest of the paper and stay engaged. In my revision I was also able to develop further on some ideas in this paragraph while cutting back on other sentences or points that didn’t necessarily fit into the claim that I made.
