Don’t Forget to Love Your Online Self Too?

Hello!

I used to have a pretty hard time on social media when I was in high school and an ~angsty teen~. Scrolling through Instagram and seeing adorable couples, enviable bodies and seemingly perfect lives does not do good things for the psyche.

Social media has been linked to the lowering of self-control as well as independent thinking. It can harm a user’s self-esteem and even their skills in social interaction. Reading articles for this post and seeing that Black Mirror episode has me wondering why I’m even on social media in the first place. Is it really worth it?

Should I, Hillary?

But on the other hand, I have received two volunteer opportunities in the past two weeks that I would not have even known about if I hadn’t been active online. I get to see pictures of family and friends I haven’t seen in ages. We live in a world where it isn’t always possible — especially where the field of Creative Industries is concerned — to go without social media. It connects us to our friends and new opportunities.

That doesn’t mean, however, that your presence on social media should be taken lightly. It can really drag you down. One thing I’ve learned is that you have to incorporate self-care tips that work for you and your online activity. I think it’s probably going to be different for everyone, but I have a few for me that are built off of some life advice I was given. All of my life advice comes from my mother, who understands better than anyone that I am, as an individual, comprised mainly of stress and a self-critiquing nature. Those two things do not mix well, especially when combined with internet access. For example:

One of my personal rules is that I’m no longer allowed to access WebMD lest I diagnose myself with cancer. Again. It isn’t necessarily social media related, but it’s a rule I think every nervous person should practice.

And though not everyone can relate as well to this piece of advice as I can, I think it can be applied to the topic of social media, and it works for me. So here it is:

Be kind to yourself.

It’s a simple thing, but it’s become the foundation of my online behaviour. For a long time when I went to post something on social media, it had to be perfect. I used to post covers on SoundCloud very frequently, but I would find something wrong with them and take them down the next day. I would rarely post on Instagram because I felt none of my pictures could compare with some of the content being posted by people I followed, whether it was a celebrity or someone I knew at school. I didn’t post anything authentic and sat and scrolled through everyone else’s social media feeds and felt sorry for myself.

It took a long time to realize that I was trying to be perfect through my content. And dude I’m really not. I was so self-critical that if something I posted wasn’t perfect, I’d beat myself up over it and that’s ridiculous. I am a constant work in progress, or as Sanjeev so eloquently put it in our class panel: “I’m still growing, and I will continue to grow until my last breath”.

Why was I so intent on living a perfect online life when I love my life just the way it is authentically, IRL? It didn’t make me feel good, but I wasn’t able to give up on social media entirely.

So adopt self-care practices for you. These are some of mine.

1. My Instagram has no theme. I don’t even bother trying. I’m not that organized. My life has no theme. I am my own theme.
2. I post things that I like or that are important to me. I share my opinion.
3. I don’t have many social media apps on my phone because it gets crowded with notifications and that’s annoying and stressful. I have also set up my email so that I have it on my phone, but it only updates when I manually do it. AKA: when I want it to. AKA: not very often.
4. If I’m having a bad day I don’t go on any social media sites and scroll aimlessly. It doesn’t make me feel better. It probably makes things worse. I do something that I know is guaranteed to make me happy instead. Like eat good food or listen to music.
5. If I’m going out with friends I will often leave my phone at home. This not only keeps me way more interested in having a great time with my pals, but it also prevents phone theft — which if you’re at Gracie’s, happens constantly.
6. I follow a lot of Twitter and Instagram accounts that make me laugh. Social media may be proven to drag you down, but laughter has been proven to be awesome for you. It even boosts your immune system? That’s wild. Laugh more please.

Okay everyone’s social media self-care tips are going to be vastly different depending on who you are as a person, so take mine lightly. However, I still think everyone should have some rules for themselves online, especially if you notice it’s affecting your mood.

In conclusion laughing is good, being kind to yourself is good, and don’t let social media drag you down.