Social Media: An Instrument of Communication or Torture?
Cailey,
You are growing up in an undiscovered digital world. While you discover it, you will get attached. But, this attachment will help you grow as a person as you learn how to control it. I say this because I remember…
Back at the age of ten, I recall creating my very first online platform, Facebook. Once I created an account, I became addicted. To what? Unfortunately… Farmville. I hardly remember the objective of the pointless game, but I strongly remember the intense FOMO (fear of missing out) I had when it came to harvesting my crops in time or getting new livestock to come to my farm. This addiction at age ten, would keep me up at night. Farmville was on my mind. All the time.
If you don’t believe me take a look at some of my Facebook posts from 2009.
My reaction as I rediscovered my past:
This was the very first, of many, social media obsessions.
After a few years, the way I used Facebook had shifted. I constantly posted statuses that were desperate for likes. The most prominent example during middle school was, like for a tbh, meaning, like for a to be honest. This allowed you to publicly express your opinion about someone, once they liked your status. Ironically, no one even told the truth. More than ten times that year, I posted this request to my account in order to feel valued as part of the Facebook community.
Soon this died down, allowing room for a new platform to be praised.
As I entered high school, Instagram joined me. Throughout the beginning of my high school career, Facebook and Instagram became my two closest friends. Facebook was being used to tell people what I was doing, while Instagram was being used to show people what I was doing.
At age 14, my social media experience was all about me.
Me. Me. Me.
In grade 9, a new Facebook trend came to surface. Creating Facebook albums in order to document each high school year. The title of the album corresponded to the grade you were in, and contained over 600 photos. This ensured everyone constantly had their phones out incase it was picture time. Each outing was posted online thereby allowing people to create their own exhibition. More importantly, these online exhibits needed likes in order to prove its importance.
Cailey, I am so happy you never bothered creating yearly albums.
Without an album to post to, I didn’t feel compelled to see every outing opportunity as a way to share online. I never felt that I had to constantly take photos to show off. But… being around the people who did feel this way, had an impact on me. Just like the TBH posts, I tried to find my way to fit in. Although I wasn’t posting to my own page, I sure as hell wanted to be included in other people’s albums. As a result, FOMO was presented in a different way. I wanted to be involved in everything, because not being included would dent my confidence.
I slowly stopped using Facebook.
Halfway through my high school career, my Facebook use was replaced by my Instagram use. Being that Instagram was my main online presence, it showed me what was and was not acceptable in society. My friends deleted their Instagram posts if they didn’t receive enough likes. Although this was wild to me, under a subconscious level, it made me realize what we value. Further, nothing says ‘cool’ like a good follower-to-following ratio. Therefore, in order to feel better about myself, I would spend time unfollowing accounts to ensure the amount of followers were greater than the amount I followed.
Thank god for VSCO.
By grade 11, I started to use this editing software app to post all the photos that didn’t make the Instagram cut. While using this application, you were unable to see how many followers an account had, or how many likes their photos received. Without the ability to compare to others, VSCO allowed me to create a better online experience. It balanced out the stresses from Instagram, since I would post whatever I wanted without any pressure.
By grade 12, Snapchat made its way in the forefront. Like all the people around me, I was addicted. It was an unhealthy obsession: The first thing I checked when I woke up, and the last thing I checked before going to sleep. I was dependent on this app to navigate me throughout my day-to-day activities. What’s more — it was encouraged and expected by the people around me. Communication was presented through Snapchat streaks and Snapchat stories, which both expired after 24 hours. This meant I needed to be on the app for 24 hours, or risk being out of the loop. Oftentimes, I went over my data limit in order to fulfil this empty desire to be included. The fear of losing a streak and missing a story controlled my thoughts. Taking selfies everywhere I went, from an outside perspective, painted me as narcissistic.
CAILEY PUT YOUR DAMN PHONE DOWN.
But I couldn’t.
The obsession was too powerful.
As the end of the year approached, I slowly began to retreat from my Snapchat use. This process began by disabling access while on cellular data. This meant no snapping at school. Since I couldn’t use Snapchat, I could listen better in class. By the end of the year, 20 Snapchat streaks turned into two Snapchat streaks — with my two closest friends. Without having streaks, there was no longer this urgency to check in all the time, which suddenly reduced my FOMO.
Fast forward to today.
I have completely turned off Snapchat notifications. It has been a breath of fresh air not having any streaks. I can’t even remember the last time I made a Snapchat story. Although I post Instagram stories, I have learned to use it in moderation. Further, my phone is always kept on Do Not Disturb. This mode has helped with both my sleeping habits and attending to my responsibilities. Now, I can enjoy 24 hours without social media reminders.
Cailey,
You were born into this social media age without the tools to navigate it. Therefore, throughout grade school you will inevitably become addicted. But, you need to become attached in order to detach. You will recognize the online world can not lead you into the dark, but rather, the people using it can. Ultimately, once you discover these tools from within, social media won’t be scary at all.
Thank you,
Cailey Bisgould
