Social Media is a Tool; Not a Weapon For Self-Destruction
Dear 12-year-old Michael,
You’ve just created a profile on Facebook, and while it may seem like a fun little website for talking to friends outside of school or playing flash games to pass time, it will impact your life in more ways than you can imagine in the years to come. Facebook is just the start of your social media journey; in a few years’ time, you’ll be on Twitter, YouTube, Tumblr, Instagram and Snapchat. These platforms are more than just new channels for communication. They will change the way you communicate, the way you see others, and the way you think others see you. Social media will add stress to your life and have a negative impact on your day-to-day activities. However, these changes are inescapable growing up in the twenty-first century and you can’t avoid social media because of it; it will become an integral part of your life. Despite all of the negative that comes with social media, it is a powerful tool for staying updated and connecting over news, events and pop culture. There are ways to minimize its negative impacts and create a better online experience for yourself.
With the introduction of social media, plenty of the face-to-face conversations that you would have had growing up in another time period now take place online. People will wish you a happy birthday on your Facebook wall, your future teachers and professors will post content and announcements on social media platforms, and celebrities and friends will update you and all of their other friends and followers on their day or important events via stories and posts. These stories and posts from friends and famous people are some of the primary stressors caused by social media. People only want to share the good on their highlight reels and social media profiles, which can cause you to believe that what you’re seeing is the entire truth. Pictures, videos or other highlights of one’s day don’t show you the hours of planning that went into a post or the hundreds of discarded photos that weren’t good enough to be shared, for instance. The perfection that we see seems effortless and makes us question why we can’t be the same way.
Why is it that we only share this good side? Perhaps the fact that almost everything we share is available for everyone to see makes us fear judgment and being vulnerable. This isn’t how we think or behave with our closest friends and it explains why intimate gatherings in person are so different from what we see on social media. Whatever the reason for putting up a facade, it is important to be aware of the lack of truth in what you see on social media to minimize the stress it causes you. Your future will probably be full of sifting through deception on social media, but I predict that you’ll improve your ability to detect lies from reality and gain the confidence to not let the picture-perfect lives of others make you look down on your own life.
The stress of counting likes and comments on social media as a form of social currency is similar to the way that people aspire to appear perfect and showcase only their best moments on their highlight reel, as they both stem from a combination of vanity and the need to compare ourselves with others. In the future, you’ll find yourself deleting posts that didn’t perform well or where you think you don’t look your best in order to maintain a higher social currency. You’ll count likes and wait by your phone for the numbers to increase. You’ll compare the number of followers you have with that of your friends (and sometimes even celebrities when you really want to wallow in self-pity).
Why do these numbers even matter? Unless you’re running a business, quite frankly, they don’t. These metrics simply make you feel good when you get plenty of likes, comments and followers, but they don’t improve your worth as a person at all. Remember that whenever you post a photo that didn’t do as well as you hoped it would. Your social media journey in the future will likely include a mix of unpopular and well-received posts, but you’ll learn to not let that phase you.
Another common stress that you will face on your social media journey is the need to constantly be updated on everything happening online. This fear of missing out will develop into a sort of addiction to your phone. A study by comScore in 2017 found that the average adult in America spends two hours and fifty-one minutes on their phone each day. Unfortunately, you’ll have days where you’ll find that you’ve spent even more time than that on your phone. This addiction and fear of missing out will cause you to procrastinate accomplishing assignments and even prevent you from being productive in areas, such as school, work, hobbies and health.
Why do we let this fear and addiction take over our lives? I think it is primarily because we think that if we miss out on some important news, we’ll lose an opportunity that could better our lives. Ironically, this desire to better our lives is preventing us from acting in ways that can do just that very thing. You’ll need to find balance in your time spent online and use social media with the right intentions so that it can be a tool for your own use instead of letting social media wear you down. I predict that finding the right balance will take time and vary between different platforms, but it can be accomplished.
In addition to increased stress and changes in your daily life, social media will strain your mental and physical health. Vibrations and light flashes will keep you up at night. You’ll feel a desire to look at every last direct message, Snapchat story and Instagram post before you’re ready to hit the hay. Even then, you’ll find it rare to get more than six hours of sleep in a typical night because of staying up late on your phone and then waiting for your body to wind down after seeing bright screens for hours on end. You’ll become part of the increasing adolescent population clinically diagnosed with anxiety and depression. Of course, mental illness is in part biological, so social media is not entirely to blame. However, it has been linked to a 3% rise in depressive episodes in adolescents between 2005 and 2014. As you mature, you will likely find greater control in limiting your social media usage and the effects it has on your health.
How can we navigate the Internet while practicing “safe social”? While there is no surefire answer to this question or solution to the issues caused by social media, there are a few ways to help your situation. Recognizing that you have a problem, reflecting on your social media usage, creating a personalized plan for your involvement online, and not engaging in toxic or bullying behaviour online in order to set a positive example are some of the best ways to tackle your issues. In your reflection, you can determine which platforms you use most frequently, how many minutes per day you are on them, and what kind of content you consume on these sites. If following someone makes your self-esteem decrease, simply just unfollow them. In your personalized plan, ensure that you are engaging with content that is meaningful to you, makes you happy and is not counterproductive to achieving your goals. Social media is meant to be a tool for improving communication and efficiency. Don’t let it become a weapon against your health.
Sincerely,
Your future self
