Social media in the offline world: a mental illness epidemic
Dear social media,
After years and years of careful deliberation and excessive manipulation, I’ve come to the conclusion that you’re horrible. Absolutely, utterly, and undeniably horrible.
I cannot tell you how many times I’ve sat in front of a screen monitoring the number of “likes” I’m getting on a recent post. Or how often I’ve scrolled through my followers list hoping that that number would in any second increase — and you get my point. But surprisingly, I’m more so annoyed than ashamed. You see, I’m not the only one suffering from what I call the “millennial curse”, commonly known as Internet or social media obsession. (Millennial because I find myself caught in the middle of having a normal, outdoorsy childhood while still being attached to my phone. Curse because it’s exactly what it is — an addiction.) In fact, social media addiction is no different than any other addiction: research has shown that an Internet addict faces similar problems as a drug user, experiencing symptoms such as withdrawal when disconnected. While I understand that the natural response would be to use the “don’t-shoot-the-messenger” excuse, this raging war between social media and mental health has taken a huge toll on society.
Why is it that whenever I attend a concert, all I see are phones raised up in the air? Why is it that in class, I’m paying more attention to the distracting person in front of me scrolling down her Facebook feed? And why is it that I can never have a proper conversation or dinner with my mom, simply because she refuses to put down her device for the sake of responsiveness?
And I believe they all have a commonality: the desire for positive social media metrics. Of course, we’d all love to take that perfect photo of our favourite celebrity. (Who wouldn’t want 1,000+ likes on a high quality photo of Adele live?!)
However, the real issue is not that we derive happiness from social media engagement, but that we use it to dictate our self-worth and other day-to-day values. I know this is really embarrassing, but I used to “judge” people based on their number of followers and likes; if one only received 20 likes as opposed to 200, it was as if you could use that against them to boost your own self-esteem. And I still hate myself for it.
The deeper you dig, you’ll soon realize that social media brings out the dark side of people. Oddly enough, I have seen more threats online through subtweets: people threaten to unfollow one another — as if a follow carried such weight — and afterward, act as if they had removed the other from the face of the Earth. And then there’s that odd person who will not follow you back, no matter how well you know him/her and how many of their photos you like. I used to ask myself if they despised me that much to not want to see my posts on their feed, only to realize now that they only wanted to keep their following number low. Oh well.
I have to say, the one thing that irks me the most is when individuals present themselves as unauthentic online. Social media is an excuse to post a party photo when you’re actually at home watching Netflix. It’s an excuse to post aesthetically-pleasing pictures for nothing but attention, which leads you to wonder why so many individuals find themselves insecure. You can easily use Kylie Jenner as an example: she uses waist trainers in addition to photoshopping any insecurities, but what we see is the final product. The same goes for your friends — if you see them out at a show with a large group of people, you’re wondering, “why isn’t that me?” while you glance at the pile of dirty plates at your side. The comparison kills us all. But in reality, as Steven Furtick so eloquently put it, “The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.” (Seriously, who has that many best friends?!)
It’s hard to dictate the biggest mental health challenge facing university students today, but whatever the cause, I’d likely point my fingers at the Internet and social media. In a day and age where we co-exist with things like “unfollower trackers” and “spam accounts” — to post what we’re too afraid to share on our main accounts — you can say that there’s a problem. When we’re too consumed with social media metrics to be our true selves, you can say that there’s an issue.
I cannot tell you how many people, strangers essentially, have followed me in hopes that I’d follow back — only to have them unfollow hours later, realizing that they don’t really care for your content nor want to engage with it. YOU were just another number to them. And maybe that’s all we ever will be to some.
Interview #4. Audition #576. First year student with a 4.33 GPA. The boy with 23 puppies and 17 followers. And it’s a horror for somebody attempting to work in the social media marketing field when an employer questions your following: it’s an unspoken rule that your number of followers determine how successful you are online, right?
God, I hope not.
Regrettably, I used to be so consumed with all aspects of social media when I was in middle to high school and those resulted in many years of self-doubt, anxiety, and depression. Days, months, years that I will never get back. And it’s not worth it: life’s too short to not want to post a photo of your grandparents on Instagram because it “doesn’t go with your theme”.
“How different would people act if they couldn’t show off on social media? Would they still do it?” — Donna Lynn Hope
So follow whoever you want. Engage responsibly. However well you manage your online identity, however, there is and always will be a dark side to social media that we need to acknowledge and fess up to.
Because frankly, I’m exhausted.
