Feel Like You Suck At Writing? — No, You Don’t.
Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle.
Upcoming episode on Becoming A Writer podcast this Saturday — we are going to talk about how treating your writing like an experiment will get you into writing mode.
Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle.
- Christian D. Larson
In late April, I was struck with the urge to paint.
The last time I painted may have been in 6th standard, so 18 years ago. As an adult, I love unwinding by watching painting videos. So, this sudden urge to pick up the brush is surprising and understandable.
Now, I didn’t want to waste money on painting material when I didn’t know what to buy. So I did the next best thing — I looked up a sip-and-paint workshop near me. Well, actually, it was the other way around. I thought of searching for such a workshop and the next time I opened my Instagram, the first thing that popped up was a sip-and-paint workshop, that too, near me. (I think Meta can now read my mind.) I didn’t waste any time and signed up for it.
This was the first time I would be canvas acrylic paint; I had no idea what was in store for me. But I did hope that I would have fun. Within the first 7–10 minutes, when we were applying the three base colours and trying to blend them seamlessly, my self-doubt rose.
“I have no idea what I am doing,” it said, “I don’t think I am doing this right.”
Thankfully, the self-doubtful voice lasted only for a second as a more hopeful voice instantly replaced it.
“Trust the process,” this positive voice said, “just like you do with your writing.”
That, I agreed with. I knew as long as I had fun and the result came together satisfactorily, I was good.
After spending one and a half hours painting while sipping on two cups of masala chai and eating a samosa and cucumber-tomato sandwich, the painting turned out to be not bad for a first try, and, most importantly, I was as incompetent as I thought I was.
When I was in school, I thought I didn’t know how to draw. Then, in 2023, I took part in a cartoon drawing course and found myself decently capable.
When I was in school, I thought I didn’t know how to paint. Now, in 2024, I took part in a painting workshop and found myself decently capable.
When I was in school, I hated writing essays and thought I could never write a good one, even if my life depended on it. Now, for the past two years, I have been writing essays for a living and have found that I am pretty good at it.
I thought I was talentless. Turns out I can become talent-full.
Why Is It Wrong For You To Think That Your Writing Sucks?
Consider the subjectiveness of writing. Writing is not like science, maths, or coding. Those activities are objective in nature — i.e. information based on facts and evidence that are verifiable. Writing, and all forms of art, are subjective in nature — i.e., information of perspective based on feelings, opinions and emotions. Therefore, if you had a terrible sleep and are now cranky because of it, you’ll judge your writing from that space and come to a wrong conclusion. On the other hand, if someone encouraged you on your last week’s writing, you are excited about your writing session and know you have what it takes. Writing and our human nature go hand in hand. And both are like kaleidoscopes, a slight change shows you a completely new and mesmerising image.
Mind the gap between the writer you are right now and the writer you aim to become. Recently, I realised that after almost three years of consistently writing my essays here, I am no longer a beginner writer. My style of writing has changed. I have grown and evolved into a better writer — going from self-critical to confident. And I am now more aligned with my writer self than I was in late 2021. And with each writing session, I am still evolving and refining as a writer. When you are a beginner writer or are returning to writing after a long time, know that there will be a gap between who you are as a writer in this present moment and who you want to become. This means your writing doesn’t suck, you just need persistent, consistent, determined practice, and over time your writing will improve.
Timing and luck play a role in your writing endeavours, too. The marker of Stranger Things decided to use the 37-year-old song by Kate Bush called Running Up The Hill, resulting in going viral among Gen-Z on TikTok and a $2.3 million income for the singer. Or what about Paulo Coelho’s The Alchemist? From getting it published in Portuguese with only 900 copies and no reprint in 1988 to having it published in English in 1994 and having sold over 150 million copies worldwide. Or on a more personal note, I didn’t know actress Kathryn Hahn existed before I saw her in the show WandaVision. I was so blown over by her performance as Agatha Harkness that now she is on my radar, and my ears perk up whenever I hear her name. Timing and luck made that happen for them. It can do the same for you; trust it.
The creative gods are checking if you really want to be a writer. When I am passing through tough times, and my writing is, what I feel, mediocre, I remind myself that the creative gods are testing me to make sure I still believe in my dream. To be able to go against the grain of society and work on a creative endeavour where there is no instant gratification, where sometimes you are going to be the only one who sees your hard work, you have to become a tenacious force. The ones who get disheartened easily or become afraid/irritated when hard work is required are filtered. And the ones who remain eventually and inevitably get rewarded with the writing life of their dreams.
How To Turn Your “I-Suck-At-Writing” In Your Favour?
Mother, not smother. Whenever the thought of not being good enough pops up in your mind, remember that you are voting against yourself. Instead of creating a space where you encourage your creativity to flourish, you are suffocating it with such negative thoughts. You can’t whip yourself into a successful writing life; you must nurture it.
Become friends with your writer self — a bit of cliched advice but still used because it works. When you are trying to become friends with someone, you strike up a conversation with them. You spend time with them in order to get to know them better. Over time, you figure out who they are and what they like or don’t like. You learn about their dreams and ambitions. You also learn about what they fear, their past hurts, and their heartbreaks. And you try to become the loving, kind, and supportive friend you hoped you had. Do that with your writer self as well, and see it open up to you willingly.
Become friends with your writing craft. One of the reasons, I think, creatives fail in their careers is while imagining and going full throttle to achieve their creative dreams, we creatives forget to consider what it will take to become a successful, prolific and satisfied artist. We can’t live a normal, society-prescribed lifestyle while also striving for our creative dreams, which go in the opposite direction. One example is when I started on my writing journey; I knew I had to give up my social life and go into hermit mode. I needed the solitude to find the writer in me. Now, eight years later, I feel confident enough in my writer self and am ready to step back into being social, with healthy boundaries of course. Understand what your writing needs from you and give it that.
Create the right environment for your writer self to flourish. Especially as a new writer, don’t go running looking for feedback. At this point of your writing journey you are a seedling, and any negative comment will kill your dreams. Just like you would take care and protect a seed to help it grow into a beautiful plant, take care and protect your writer self. Make sure you give it space, time, effort and love to grow strong enough before you let the world see it. Present your writing to the world too early, and they’ll tear you to pieces. Present your writing to the world when you are grounded and strong in yourself, and no matter what the world says, good or bad, it won’t sway you and make you quit.
Churn out finished pieces of writing as often as you can and regularly. This is the best way to reduce your suckiness at writing. The point is to have finished pieces of writing to show yourself that you are putting in the effort towards your writing dreams. Figure out what is your meaning of “often” and regularly” and stick to it. But don’t let the duration between two finished works be too long. For me, it is writing at least two essays per week. If I write one, I feel like I haven’t written anything at all. And if I write 4–5 essays per week, I know I am rushing and heading towards burnout. When I am in my fiction writing mode, I need to write once a week. If I write once every other week or once a month, it doesn’t satisfy my writer soul and makes me feel I am not doing enough, and that feeling sucks.
Congratulate yourself. Recently, I got the chance to dive back into my novel in progress. Guess how many days I was able to do so? 109 days! With that realisation, I could have gone down the route of “Oh, you are not serious enough about your writing.” But I went the other direction; I congratulated myself. The fact that the novel still lives in me, and not a day goes by when I am not thinking about it, and that when I got the space I visited it shows me how determined I am to write it. And it’s not that for those 109 days, I was lying around, scrolling social media and eating chips while sitting in such a position that will make my spine cry in anguish later. During those 109 days, I was busting my ass off in the learning, pre-production, production and post-production of my podcast while also maintaining my weekly essay publishing schedule and fulfilling my duties as a human. Now tell me, are you noticing how much you are doing — taking care of your family, fulfilling your responsibilities, running errands — and after all that you are still giving time to nurture your writing dreams? This is a laborious, exhausting act to accomplish, and you are still doing it! Give yourself some credit and a pat on your back!
Have faith and fun. All this — living a human life while also working on your writing dreams — is of no use if you don’t have faith and fun. Life doesn’t come with a timetable where you know when what is happening. Life unfolds in the way it is necessary for your soul’s growth, and that will be different for everyone. So keep taking action towards your dreams and have faith that everything will work out. And have fun! Don’t take things more seriously than it is required. That will result only in stress and anxiety. Have fun with your writing, and see where it takes you.
And remember, just because you are not able to write right now like the writer you imagine you are doesn’t mean you don’t have the potential to become that writer.
