I Did The Sober September Challenge, and This is What I Learned
I did the sober September challenge this year because I felt like I drank a bit too much the month before. At the beginning of August, I drank for a week straight on the Kentucky Bourbon Trail. During the middle of the month, I was catching up with friends at bars. At the end of month, I flew to DC for my close friend’s wedding, which included an open bar and old friends I hadn’t seen in years. Drinking was starting to turn into an automatic habit instead of a conscious decision during social situations.
I’m happy to report that I 1) successfully completed the challenge and 2) also learned four invaluable lessons along the way.
- Subconscious habits are powerful, and you should be actively aware of what you are doing and why.
The first week of Sober September is the weirdest because you become actively aware of social situations involving alcohol:
- Catching up with friends after work usually means going to a bar or restaurant.
- Going out to a restaurant for date night? The first thing the waiter asks is what you’d like to drink.
- We all know that a glass of wine with dinner at home is fine. Healthy even, according to studies, because of all the tannin.
- A beer with coworkers at a team event doesn’t hurt anyone. Also, it’s at happy hour prices, so you are being thrifty!
Normally, I would automatically say yes in these situations because, why not? It’s not like I had a particularly compelling reason to say no. As a result, my social auto-pilot would just turn on and I’d mindlessly order a drink.
By cutting out alcohol for 30 days, I was able to clearly see the triggers that led me down the social drinking rabbit hole. This also raised the next question in my mind: If these were social situations where I would mindlessly react to drinking, what other situations do I have pre-programmed responses to in life?
2. Non-Alcoholic beer is pretty good
The definition of covering is when you hide your identity and pretend to be like the majority. When I met up with a friend at the bar, I felt like I needed to cover that I was not drinking and blend in with everyone else.
I asked my usual bartender for a non-alcoholic drink and he delivered, a Coors Light non-alcoholic beer. Poured into a glass, it had that golden lager color and carbonation, good enough to pass for a beer. In terms of taste, it was surprisingly decent and reminded me of carbonated barley tea.
The next time I went out with coworkers, I decided to order a virgin Bloody Mary. It had tomato juice, which is healthy, and no one would know that there is no alcohol. It’s also more expensive than a non-alcoholic beer so I’d be able to give the bar some more business. Over the course of the evening, I ended up have three Bloody Marys, all of which varied in flavor, salt, and spiciness. By the end of the night, I was so dehydrated, I felt like I needed to drink a gallon of water. As a friend later told me, bartenders hate it when you order a Bloody Mary outside of brunch because it requires they mix the cocktail by hand — which takes more time than twisting a cap off a beer or placing a glass under a tap.
As I quickly learned, it’s very difficult to find drink options that do not have 1) alcohol; 2) added sugar; 3) high levels of salt; or 3) caffeine.
This eliminates soda, tonic water, Bloody Mary mix, margarita mix, and coffee. Really, what you are left with at most places is water. It would be great to see bars and restaurants carry more non-alcoholic and healthy beverages as options on the menu. Make it carbonated coconut water, Kombucha or some pine tree fizz water, I don’t care. Start the trend that you don’t need to always drink alcohol at a bar when you are catching up with friends. Turn the bar into a social watering hole no matter what you may drink.
3. Detoxes are good to get back to your baseline
It wasn’t immediate but I noticed a gradual trend where I was getting better sleep and waking up more refreshed, where I didn’t need coffee immediately after waking up. I felt more alert and less sluggish. The bloated feeling also went away.
As my body washed away the toxins and reset my tolerance to alcohol, I found that my taste for alcohol diminished. Instead of needing 2–3 beers to feel a buzz, I was good with just going to the gym and working out to get that endorphin high.
It was really great getting time back that I’d normally spend drinking at a bar and having more energy from the flywheel of getting better sleep and working out.
Better than words, though, is a before/after photo to highlight the change.
4. You go on a mental roller coaster when you cut out alcohol
Week 1: Strong Confidence
How hard could it be to not drink? This will be a piece of cake.
Week 2: Moral Superiority
Why do other people always drink mindlessly? They should sober up, those drunkards. Also, I’ll just avoid hanging out with people to not drink.
Week 3: Day Dreaming
Some fresh hops beer would be pretty tasty. Also, that bourbon won’t drink itself. I miss my friends.
Week 4: Zen Calm
I don’t need alcohol. Alcohol is nice but not essential to every single social situation. The beast has been calmed.
The hardest thing about not drinking for 30 days wasn’t the alcohol itself. It was navigating the social situations because drinking is embedded in modern culture. A beer at happy hour, a glass of wine after work, a pour of bourbon with friends.
Sober September taught me that while alcohol is a social lubricant, it isn’t the only one. I’ve learned to mix it up and come up with other alternatives to catching up with friends. Like going for a walk, or going pumpkin picking and drinking hot apple cider afterwards. Essentially, I’ve learned to put in just a bit more thought into spending quality time with friends beyond going to the closest bar or restaurant.
I’m refreshed and empowered. I am in control of my life, awake and ready to take on the next challenges of life. All because I made the simple decision to take on Sober September and held firm to my word to not drink for 30 days.
If you are on the fence about doing Sober September or Dry January, I’d urge you to give it a try. At worst you don’t drink for a month (which is still a win from a health perspective), and at best you learn some new thing about yourself during the process!
