Humor

Alexa Personality Writer? Count Me IN!

Dear Amazon: Consider this my official job application for your LinkedIn Alexa Personality Writer Ad.

Image is screenshot of Alexa Ad (Fair Use)

Dear Amazon:

First off, let me say that I myself have no personality.

Image by Ollyy: licensed via Shutterstock

That shouldn’t be a bad thing, though, since I’ve heard that you run a sweatshop. Like, everywhere. Warehouse workers? Sweatshop. Delivery drivers? Sweatshop. Amazon store and merchandise centers? Sweatshops. Engineering and dev centers? Sweatshops.

I can only imagine what conditions are like working for your logistics operations:

Amazon Global Logistics | Ship directly to fulfillment centers at reduced landed costs and…

Original Photo by Ian Taylor on Unsplash: Photoshopped by author

“Hey, boss, another crew member jumped overboard.”