Things I Think While Running
A San Francisco jog from the Mission through SoMa to the Embarcadero then down to the Dogpatch and back across the Mission.
--
Whoa, it’s way colder out than I thought it would be.
That’s cool. No problem. I’ll warm up. We’re gonna crush it today.
OK. Start slow. Don’t burn out too fast. Nice and easy.
(To oncoming van) Are you going to stop? Great. Thanks, asshole.
Time to hold my breath past the crowd of smokers standing around the rehab parking lot making smoke. So many smokers so early in the day! Maybe you guys should take a lap? 3… 2… 1… and exhale!
I can’t believe I used to smoke like that. I never could of run like this then. Never would of imagined I could. Crazy how much things can change in just a few years.
This is a goddamn long light. I hate waiting at lights. That’s life running in the city I guess.
OK, shake it off. Stay positive. Get back in the flow. Keep it mellow. Keep it in the yellow.
Love this song. Why doesn’t it play more often? If shuffle was truly random, wouldn’t this come up more often? I run almost every day with the same set of songs. I guess some things we weren’t meant to understand.
Warming up. Feeling good. Fast and strong.
(To oncoming car) Hey! I’m crossing here! Thank you!
What is that ahead? Is that…? Oh. My. God. That. Is. Disgusting. Steer clear. Get away. Look away.
Shake it off. Stay positive. Feeling good.
Did I remember to lock the door at home? Probably… No one would break into my house in the middle of the day, right?
When was that half marathon again? I should totally do it. It would probably be easy, right? Add another medal to the collection. Wait, I think I’m already registered for a different race a few weeks after that. Too much? Yeah, probably too much. Forget it.
Don’t slip on that broken glass. That would probably hurt. And look really stupid.
Last light for a while. Nice.
Look at that bridge! Smell that ocean air! Feel that breeze!
Nope — skip this song. Again. Why is this song even on my phone? Note to self — get this song off this phone. Wait, what song was that?
Now that’s probably just a puddle of water ahead, but assuming urine to be safe. 3… 2… 1… up and over!
I think I’m going too fast. Simmer down, buddy. Stay in the yellow.
OK, let’s put some distance between me and that big dog coming this way. That guy staring at his phone is obviously oblivious. I would be a much better dog-owner than him. I wouldn’t ignore my dog. And all the people running directly at us.
There’s one of the America’s Cup racing boats — so cool!
I should call my dad sometime.
Now I’m too hot. Why did I wear long sleeves today? Dumb, dumb, dumb. Sleeves up.
Where else on one run from your front door can you see the Golden Gate Bridge, the Bay Bridge, Alcatraz, Giants Stadium, sea lions, the world’s fastest boats, Coit Tower, the Ferry Building? Nowhere! This city is fucking amazing!
Maybe I should sign up for a full marathon. I know there’s one a few months away. Is that enough time to get ready? I’m pretty much already there, right? Hmm. I don’t know. Eh, let’s save it for next summer.
Man, a lot of people run in this town. I wonder what visiting tourists think of San Francisco. Do this many people run in other cities? I doubt it based purely on my own imagination and absolutely no other real evidence.
I think I’m going too slow. Let’s take it up to orange.
Did I remember to email the team before I left work yesterday? Forget it. Not important.
Now that’s a new feeling in my knee. I wouldn’t describe it as pain exactly, but something’s definitely different… It’ll go away. Carry on!
I wish I hadn’t worn a hat today. It’s too hot and I probably look stupid.
This light is taking FOR-EV-ER.
There’s Sutro Tower half covered in fog. So epic. It’s like a science fiction matte painting but better. It’s like Cloud City in The Empire Strikes Back but real.
Where did that wind come from? Now I’m cold. Sleeves down.
Shit. Where is the nearest water fountain? I thought there was one here? I guess I passed it. That might be a problem.
(To oncoming truck) Hello! Get off your goddamn phone!
I think I started too fast. Now I’m really thirsty. I’m not entirely sure I can make it all the way back home. Do not stop now or I will not be able to start again. Plus I forgot my Clipper Card to take the bus.
(To oncoming pedestrian) Are you going to move? I know you see me! If you knew how far I’ve run today, you would get out of the way. At least I think you would. Maybe you wouldn’t. But you should or you would be a horrible person!
What would happen if I just fell over right here? Would anyone see me? Would anyone help me? Would they know who to call? How long would it take an ambulance to get here? Why do I do this to myself?
OK, last mile. Let’s finish this thing. Fast as you can. Crank it up to red. Climb the hill. Full speed. Yes it hurts, but this is the end. Oh. My. God. Come on! Breathe, dammit! Karate chops!
And done!
(Panting, walking,gasping, panting, crouching, spitting, staggering, panting)
Well, at least I didn’t die. This time. Tomorrow we rest, but I’m pretty sure I could go a little bit further than that. I guess I’ll do it all over again until I do…
