What You Don’t See In My Journey
The other side of entrepreneurship you don’t hear about in mass media.
I have to tell you, I’m an solopreneur. What does that mean? It means that I work alone, but I have a running business. Just like any other solopreneurs out there, the face of our business looks professional enough so clients can trust us (they should), but the operations is a one-man show.
I’ve had my ups and downs as an entrepreneur. I experienced creating a team of my own and failing out as well because I had spoiled them too much. I have my fair share of experimental leadership scenarios that only propelled me into becoming a more seasoned business person. I don’t regret my past since I have learned so much from them.
As for my business, it looks flashy on paper. My company is probably in better shape now than when I started it 3 years ago. Before, it was all over the place. Now, with all of the mistakes and successes I’ve seen and had, I arrived at this place of clarity.
I finally know what my business is.
This could be one of the most daunting challenges of entrepreneurs. We all have these bold ideas, ideas that are supposed to change the world. But, when we try to execute on them, it transforms into something else. Along the line, we see the competition from left and right. We notice the big guys and what they are doing and we shift our focus from what we want it to be to what the trends are.
We then crumple into this mess of not knowing where our direction is supposed to be? Do I offer something better than the competition? Is my message strong enough? Does it really matter?
I started stepping into this new level of entrepreneurship, but it feels like a blessing and a curse. At one hand, you feel wiser and calmer. You are more confident of your vision and your skills. But at the same time, the voices inside you becomes stronger.
I’ve had my fair share of failures and rejections in life. I can say that some of it propel and even inspire me, while the others transform into self-defeating doubts.
When people see me, they all see the grandeur of it all. The money, first of all. They also see the tons of possibilities of my success, most of the time, even before I do. Some say I could be in a magazine. Some say I could do talks and inspire other people. Others give me parenting, money and all other kinds of advise that they could not do themselves.
But what they do not know would probably eat them alive.
I’ve met thousands of entrepreneurs, but I have to say, there are different types of businessmen out there. There are those who own companies because they have successfully climbed up the corporate ladder; there are some who inherited it; then there the likes of us who tried to build it from the ground up — literally built from the ground.
For us, we had to scour our ideas against the odds. We have to find resources in a way others won’t. Why? Because we have no other choice. We have to be creative in how we do things and smart about our strategies.
These may all sound impressive, but you don’t understand.
For me, I have good days and bad days. But, so does everyone else. What’s the point?
The point is, most of you do not see it. You don’t see the struggle deep within our hearts. Those deafening voices in your head telling you all the reasons why you can’t do it… why you’re a fake trying to make it out there.
These voices are so loud that there are days, even weeks, when I get paralyzed. These are the times when I feel like I’m close to my goals, but I’m so weak, emotionally and physically, to even move and respond.
I can’t tell these voices off and say, “You don’t know me! I can do this! I can succeed!”
The sad thing is, I believe I also made these voices myself.
They say that you are your worst enemy and now I know this to be true.
I’ve had many seasons in my career where I’ve felt like this. I’ve felt like quitting every single day. I tell myself, if I’m not doing this, trying to be an entrepreneur, I’d have a peaceful life like everybody else, worrying about what everybody else worries about. I could be happy. I could, couldn’t I?
Then, I pause.
What you don’t see is this struggle. This feeling of quitting and wanting to survive at the same time. I could only do my best to describe this the way it is, but honestly, unless you have been in a position of believing in something so utterly impossible and working your life to achieve it, it would be hard to comprehend.
But, then I go back. I go back to myself and fight the my way through it. Because ultimately, I have these 3 strong “Why’s” to hold onto. 3 reasons for fighting just a little bit more. For living one day at a time and believing with all your heart that this vision, this dream I have in me, will come to life.
For those who are also struggling out there, I hope you can at least 1 of these reasons reach you today:
1. My Family
I was born in a poor environment. Whatever your lot is in life, in one way or another, your family should be a good reason to move forward. I believe I was lucky enough to born like this because I have more enthusiasm and eagerness to push forward when I could have quit only because I want my family to have a better life. Whenever I feel lost or quitting, I turn to them and tell myself to push again… try again just one more time. This time, harder than before. Because for what it’s worth, it’s for them
2. Myself
At some point, I know I’m a selfish person. I do things to prioritize the way I want to live my life, but this has some good points when you’re an entrepreneur. I also remember my young self…the days when it was not as complicated and as mind-numbing as these. I remember that kid who used to believe that the world could be conquered and that dreams could come true. With that, I remind myself that this is my life path. This is the dream embedded in my heart and I would regret it for the rest of my life if I don’t go all the way through.
This is for me, for my passion and for what I believe in. This is for all the hard work I’ve done over the years. This is to give myself a chance to believe again…in myself.
I will do it for me simply because I deserve it.
3. My Hometown & Others
I’ve always admired Lisa Nichols. Her story is so strong you couldn’t help but be empowered. She was a solo parent, raising a black boy in a dangerous environment. I relate to Lisa in that way, but there’s this one thing that struck me the most.
She said that she owed it to her hometown and to her neighbors to get out and reach for her success. Why? Because she had to show them that they can, too. They can get out no matter what. They can be successful even if they were born in that neighborhood. They can reach for the stars and get there.
Looking at my own circle, I’ve had young kids and young adults who also look up to me. Whether I could inspire them or not, it’s up to me and up to them. But, I have many dreams of helping other people, especially the ones who were like me, the poor. I wanted to be successful so I could have all the resources I need to create the programs I want to help them. I wanted to be successful so I can show the younger generations that success is not predicated by where you grew up, where you graduated in college or who your parents are.
Success is determined by your grit and your capability to always look up whenever you’re crashed down.
Yes, there are days that I would need to get away from it all or binge-watch TV series and movies (or animes), but most of the time, I could just look back at these three major things and get back on track.
FINAL NOTES
Entrepreneurship, the true form of it, looks majestic on the outside, but it’s an everyday battle. If you’re an entrepreneur or you know someone who is, do not praise them on the money. That’s not really the point. Don’t tell them to treat you out (because they often do when they know they can). Instead, tap them on the shoulder and tell them, “I know you can. I know it’s hard, but I know you can.” These words can make a difference in their phases.
So, for my parting words:
“I believe in you!”