Say “Thanks” if You Want to Get Ahead
I talk, a lot, about measuring backward when you are stuck in a rut. You can lose sight of how far you’ve come when you only focus on goals not yet reached. But when you do remember to gauge progress based on backward-looking improvements, you can experience positive momentum and feel like all that hard work has been worth it. Dan Sullivan from Strategic Coach taught me that, and I spread the gospel whenever I can.
While my “dream forward, measure backward” mantra has made its rounds through social media, I haven’t talked much about the importance of saying “thank you” as much as I should. I feel a twinge of guilt over neglecting this detail, but we’re all here now, aren’t we? When measuring backward, be sure to thank those who raised you up along the way. If you think you got to where you are without any help, wake up, son.
Huge applause to Duncan Bureau from Air Canada, the featured guest on my second episode of LinkedUp on LinkedIn, for his thoughtful discussion on making space for thanks.
Duncan is currently the President of Air Canada Rouge and has worked for several other airlines over his 25+ year tenure in the airline industry. I asked Duncan to name the people who have influenced his career trajectory, and he shared a personal story about a high school teacher who changed his life forever.
“Ed was just one of those teachers who always believed in me. In high school, I wasn’t a straight-A student. I was more interested in sports, cars and girls, and I didn’t pay much attention to academics. For some reason, Ed saw my potential and encouraged me to focus on math and accounting. Later on, I went to university and did well, earning degrees in both accounting and finance. A lot of that achievement was thanks to my teacher’s motivation and belief that I could do it. Other teachers in that school probably thought I was going to end up in jail. So, I literally sent Ed a note yesterday to tell him that where I am today is thanks to the influence he had on me during a critical period in my life. I received a response from Ed later on which said that it was incredible for him to receive that note when he did, because his wife had actually passed away that morning…I was reminded that we have no idea how much of an impact we can have on people’s lives just by remembering to say a simple ‘thanks’.”
Damn. What better evidence than Duncan’s story do you need that showing gratitude matters?
Positively Grateful
In positive psychology research, gratitude is most often defined as the appreciation of things that are valuable or meaningful to you, according to Harvard Medical School.
Two psychologists, Dr. Robert A. Emmons of the University of California, Davis, and Dr. Michael E. McCullough of the University of Miami, have dedicated their work to research on gratitude. In one study, they asked all participants to write a few sentences each week, focusing on particular topics.
One group wrote about things they were grateful for. A second group wrote about things that had irritated them, and the third wrote about events that had affected them (with no emphasis on them being positive or negative). After 10 weeks, those who wrote about gratitude were more optimistic and felt better about their lives.
While these studies cannot scientifically prove that gratitude improves our lives, such evidence does support an association between gratitude and an individual’s well-being.
As stated in a CNBC Make It article, “Taking the time to be thankful and appreciative for things you have received, tangible or intangible, makes you feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improves your health, helps you deal with adversity and builds strong relationships — all crucial traits both in and out of the workplace.”
I regularly cite the happiness equation in my Vlogs and Blogs, and remind myself as much as my followers that the more you share, and the more you give, the more positivity you will get back. I will be sure to add gratitude into the mix as a vital element that contributes to positivity.
3 Easy Ways?
Here’s the part of the blog where you should typically find the three-to-five easy ideas to start showing more gratitude in your life, right now. But you know what? I won’t reduce the power of gratitude to a few lukewarm snippets of advice.
You already know there are people in your life you need to thank. You already know that the more you measure backward, the more you will realize there are tons of reasons to feel grateful. Thanking people is cathartic, but you also never know what it’ll do for others in the moment.
And here’s a final secret: the very best thing about measuring back and expressing thanks? It’s an excellent exercise in remembering to help people whenever you can. To give back. To believe in people. To put other people first.
When others took the time to do it for you, it mattered. Now here’s your chance to matter to someone who needs that encouragement today.