Why Do We Murder the Beautiful Friendships of Boys?
An epidemic of loneliness is being forced on boys and men
O n a cold February night a few years ago, professor and researcher Niobe Way presented findings from her book Deep Secrets in New York. She was hosted by Partnership with Children, a groundbreaking organization doing powerful interventions with at-risk children in New York’s public schools. The work done by folks like Way and Partnership with Children has produced reams of hard statistical data proving that emotional support directly impacts every metric of academic performance — and, as it turns out, every other aspect of our lives as well.
That night, as my partner Saliha and I made our way down the snow-blown streets toward Fifth Avenue, I was feeling the somber weight of the third month of the dark Northeast winter, wondering how many days remained until spring would come. “It’s February. Don’t kid yourself,” came the answer. My charming and lovely partner was to take me to dinner after Way’s presentation. It was my birthday.
Niobe Way is Professor of Applied Psychology at New York University and the co-Director of the Center for Research on Culture, Development, and Education at NYU. A number of years ago, she started asking teenage boys what their closest friendships meant to them and documenting what…
