SAG 2021 — Week 14 Report
Congratulations SAGers, the regular season is over. Welcome to the post-season.
For the first time in the eleven-year history of the SAG, all teams now have something at stake. As is the way, there is likely to be a bit of team and result juggling over the next couple of weeks to force Yahoo to give the outcome that the league desires, but that's the price we pay for living on the sharp edge of innovation.
Let's go over the details for this post-season’s newest initiatives.
Wildcard Shootout is going to be epic. Positions 3 through 6 all play heads up, with the two highest scoring teams earning the right to play off in the semi-finals. Everyone down to 6th place is alive in the hint for a jacket and that's extremely exciting. There has been a slight tweak to the format proposed prior to the season commencement, done in the pursuit of adding an extra element of gamesmanship and some pre-Christmas excitement and social activity. Next week, a league Zoom Christmas event will be held for all GMs. Through the right he has earned by finishing on top of the league ladder, the JABs will choose live, the team that he will face in the semis. Rather than automatically take on the second highest scoring team in the usual seeding process, his opponent will be called out in front of the league. A virtual throwing down of the gauntlet leading into the Christmas weekend. Geez it's going to be good. Westy will take on the team for the right to contest the first ever New Year's SAG Bowl.
At the other end of the table, the Leonard Royale begins this weekend. A best of three series with the loser being bestowed the shame of being labelled as the Leonard for 2021 and then having to complete the 24-hour McDonalds Feast. Refuse the feast, 3-year ban. Leave early, forfeit your carry over FAAB cash for next year.
24 hours is an extraordinarily long time to spend at a Maccas dinner and so let's go over the rules for how the Leonard can shorten their stay:
- Every burger eaten will deduct an hour from the required time. Burgers larger than a cheeseburger count (see rule 3 for exception).
- ‘Running the Menu’ will reward the Leonard with an additional 3 bonus hours in addition to the burgers within the full menu. ‘Running the Menu’ entails consuming 1 each of the following: Big Mac, McChicken, Quarter Pounder, Double Cheese Burger, Fillet-o-Fish, Happy Meal, 6 chicken nuggets, Small sundae, Apple Pie, and large Fries.
- ‘Running the Menu’ also unlocks the ability to count a basic Cheeseburger as an hour deduction.
- If the Leonard can get a fellow SAG GM to dine with them, their burgers will also count as deductions (including any bonus hours earned).
- During breakfast hours, Mighty McMuffins and Big Brekkie Burgers are the only time deduction qualifiers.
- FAAB budget is considered legal tender for participating in burger consumption.
In the best-case scenario, if the Leonard can persuade another GM to ‘Run the Menu’ with them, they could get out of there in 4 hours. This feels about right to me. The 24-hour Feast will need to be completed prior to draft next year and it's expected to be evidenced and well broadcast/documented via the league WhatsApp.
May the best man win. Onto the recaps.
C4NT lost to JABs
This ended up being close thanks to some Tuesday heroics from J Conner but being a dead rubber to JABs, it only meant anything to one team. The News Team lose four on the trot now and limps into playoffs with a horribly out of form line up. A last-minute SOS to Big Ben propped up the scoreline too and it looks like only a turnaround for the ages can breathe life into their season from here. JABs will keep their head down and work hard on the training track during the week off. Lamar will be a big loss for the Asterisks’. Perhaps this is the challenge that will deem him worthy of shaking off that superscript against the COVID campaign….
Rubbers lost to Gypsies
An old-fashioned spanking in this one. Only a few yards off raising the bat for a triple digit victory margin, only a few weeks ago there was talk of this match up being the Leonard Royale. Now the Gypos are flying, with 53 points coming off freshly trade acquired players. Buying the dip indeed. Meanwhile the Rubbers sold off nearly 30 points from this week's score and will go in as short priced Leonard favorite.
Cainers lost to TacoCorp
Rounding out the Leonard Royale will be the Cainers after the loss here. One feels the season at CainerTown has brought many highs: The King and his moments of brilliance, the CainerCoaster and some incredible scoring runs, and of course the newest member of the SAG junior program. We shall see what the next few weeks bring before we decide on how to stamp this year for the team. Taco phoned it in during the week of his 40th and took a well-deserved break to enjoy some celebratory cocktails around the pool. He’ll be fired up to cause chaos over the next couple of weeks and we can’t wait.
Patches lost to Bandits
A big final round score from the Bandits got them to finish the regular season on .500 after what could only be described year. Let's see how the asset rich team fares in the big show from now, if final round momentum counts for anything then the Bandit train might finally be getting close to the 88 miles per hour required to really launch. a 170 week with a donut included is a formidable form line. Patches phoned in a regulation score from the golf course for his part of the dead rubber. Brady and Herbert just bank 25+ in their sleep these days which is a handy floor to have. He’ll kick back and dissect his students VCE results this weekend before switching back on about this time next week.
Playoffs baby!
2nd and 15,
Commish Clue
