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DOGE
Elon Musk and His Bad DOGE
Not Everything Elon Does Turns to Gold
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I sent Elon Musk several letters asking for a free Tesla. I figured, as he already knew me, knew how broke I was, had loads of money, and couldn’t sell his Teslas anyway ’cause of swastikas, he might be inclined to give me a free one.
He rang me. Said he could do better than that. Told me to wait for a special delivery. I would be delighted.
He wouldn’t tell me what it was. He’s a bit funny like that. Clever person being mysterious — that’s the vibe he’s aiming for.
I told Dave about it. “He sounds like an asshole,” said Dave. Dave can be a little blunt sometimes. He’s not used to higher society like I am.
A couple of days later, a parcel arrived. Marked “FRAGILE,” so the delivery guy only kicked it gently toward the door while taking photos of it.
I wondered about doing an unboxing thing like you see on YouTube, but I don’t have an account or a video camera. So I just opened it.
Shit!
Inside was a puppy. With a lead, a label, and an instruction leaflet. Instructions for a puppy? I’m not an…
