%#$%@’ING NETWORKING — It’s a Beautiful Thing During COVID-19
Years ago I wrote this story and revised today, because with layoffs and the need for physical distancing, people feel networking isn’t viable. In actuality, it’s more important than ever.
We have to reinvent how we network, because the most effective way to change is through action, not analysis.
One of the best actions is to connect.
I frequently turn to the most amazing Herminia Ibarra for insight. She’s renowned for her research into career management, and throws the “think first, then act” mantra out the window! Knowledge, she says, is the result of doing and experimenting. For Ibarra, career change is not a onetime event, but a psychological process of transition. I encourage you to explore her article, “Reinventing Your Career In The Time of Coronavirus.”
The word networking has negative connotations in our society. You’re at a happy hour, and the Networker smiles insincerely, pushes their business card into your hand and backs you into a corner. You’re like an orange and they’re jamming a straw into you — SSSSSSSSSSLURP — your time and energy are sucked out. They don’t remember your name and look around the room while you’re talking, searching for higher quality targets, then move on to their next victim. In the online world, it’s those LinkedIn invitations to connect from a random stranger, without a personal note why they’re reaching out. Ack!!!! Have to admit, drives me crazy because it only takes a minute.
What a shame people cringe at the concept of networking, because done the right way, it’s both rewarding plus lets you imagine diverse possible futures. Ibarra says, “The golden rule of networking for career change has always been to mobilize your weak ties — that is, the relationships you have with people you don’t know so well or don’t see very often, in order to maximize your chances of learning things you don’t know already.”
I often use the word connecting instead. Enter into a conversation with the genuine desire to learn, to collaborate, and to support an individual. Most of the time I end up doing a lot of work helping people with contacts and resources. Givers gain.
Connecting is about sharing, learning and helping. It’s a two-way street. Enter the conversation with an honest interest in them: You’ll stand out in the crowd. The experience will be rewarding for both parties.
How to Do It — Online
Search for events tied to topics that interest you, be open, curious and don’t limit yourself to business-related topics.
- I recently volunteered as a judge for a University of Washington startup competition, learning about 30 amazing companies, connecting with diverse, talented individuals.
- Try Meetup.com events. Last week, I attended a Virtual startup coffee and made three interesting connections — who I then connected with my network to help them move their businesses forward.
- Career Coaches have opened my eyes to possibilities as well as connected me to inspirational individuals. Thank you and a big plug for Matt Youngquist and Elizabeth Atcheson.
Live Connections
- Steve Jobs used to have “walking meetings, ” and Stanford’s study found that creative thinking improves while a person is walking. I occasionally plan “Walk-n-Talks” with friends, colleagues and clients while respecting social distance.
- I put two chairs in our front yard and finish my day enjoying the garden. My ten yards of wood chips (www.chipdrop.com) has been a great conversation starter, had many amazing conversations with passers-by, learning about their lives and careers.
Quality vs. Quantity
Whether you attend an event online or in person, have one “non-surface” conversation. For me, a good conversation doesn’t just mean I moved business forward, it could mean that I collaborated, got inspired, or had a deepened connection — all opening my mind to possibilities I might never have considered.
So be thoughtful — what are 1-2 things you hope to walk away with? Ask them about their needs, challenges and goals both personally and professionally. If you think of a resource that might help them, offer it. And leave them with food for thought: if I feel there’s potential to further the relationship, I leave them with a statement or query that makes them want to talk with me again. That makes them think, “She could be a valuable resource.” Be patient: you never know where a conversation might lead, and it likely won’t happen overnight.
Lastly, it’s not just about business & career results, it’s about growing as an individual; by spending extra time and energy both before and after encounters, I’ve gained insight, inspiration and the feeling that sometimes I truly make a difference in the lives of others.
Bio:
Nicey Hilton grew up in Portland, Oregon and graduated from University of Washington in Seattle with a degree in English, because her dad said, “To be successful in business, you better know how to write well.”
She began her career learning how to manage all aspects of a business, including washing cars in a suit. Once her suits wore out, she transitioned into sales, training and consulting roles in the healthcare/tech industries. She’s finally starting to write again (thanks to Dad) and resides in Seattle, Washington with her husband, two teens and French bulldog.
You can find her at:
www.linkedin.com/in/niceyhilton/
nicey.hilton@gmail.com
