Movie Series Ranking #2: Alien
If aliens were SpOoOoKy!
“This is Ripley, last survivor of the Nostromo, signing off.” -Ripley… obviously.
Introduction
In the spirit of Halloween, I have decided to do my second movie series ranking on the joint sci-fi/horror franchise known simply by the name of its debut film: Alien. In the not-too-distant future, humanity discovers an alien species, known as xenomorphs, which are confusingly both hungry for humans, and want to plant their eggs in them. Spanning 6 feature films (not including the Predator crossovers) from the late 70's to the modern day, the Alien series explores every corner of the sci-fi horror genera, including unique settings, twisted themes, and all the various ways that an alien can kill a human… and vice versa. Sci-Fi Movie Reviews (essentially just me) is ecstatic to release the second official movie series ranking, featuring the films in the Alien franchise. Hope you enjoy!
6. Alien 3 (1992)
Score: 58/100
It’s safe to say that Alien 3 is the Phantom Menace of the Alien franchise. In the first 10 minutes, they completely destroy the hard-fought resolution reached in Aliens, basing the entire plot on the fact that a face-hugger (baby alien) somehow made it onto Ripley’s ship after they supposedly destroyed the alien threat on LV-426. The alien causes the ship to crash onto a penal colony planet, stranding Ripley there and releasing the alien upon the unsuspecting prisoners inside. The film manages a few unique plot devices, like the fact that the alien won’t attack Ripley because of an alien embryo inside her, and how they kill the alien in the final scene dousing it with cold water after it was coated in molten lead, but all in all watching Alien 3 hurts more than getting sucked into a ventilation fan. The CGI and special effects are sad, the action and horror sequences are repetitive, and the supporting characters are uninteresting and difficult to tell apart. In the course of the film, the writers kill off Ripley, an innocent dog, and even Newt (the lovable little girl from Aliens), who they then perform a gruesome autopsy on to no avail or purpose to the plot. Compound all of this with sub-par dialogue, the sexualization of Ripley’s character, and the fact that the only person that survives the movie is a dude you only really learn about in the last 20 minutes, this Alien film, like the alien’s victims, makes you wish for a quicker end.
5. Alien Resurrection (1997)
Score: 70/100
For what they were given in Alien 3, the 4th addition to the franchise isn’t a horrible film. Ripley is brought back to life 200 years after her death via DNA from blood samples recovered from the penal colony. The scientists who cloned her, however, mix her DNA with that of a xenomorph to create a slew of alien-human hybrid experiments, because science. Of course, these alien hybrids escape on board the ship, and begin the bloodbath that is Alien Resurrection. The cinematography is actually pretty on point for this film, and the story line is well paced and relatively creative. Still, Resurrection is dragged down by shoddy dialogue and humor, and underdeveloped characters. I am also personally not sure how I feel about Ripley’s clone being almost emotionally connected to the xenomorphs. Though it shows a new side of her character never before seen, it is definitely uncomfortable and off-putting in some scenes, and not in a good way. Plot devices aside, this movie contains probably the coolest alien death of the franchise: an alien getting sucked into space through a hole no larger than a fist!
4. Alien Covenant (2018)
Score: 75/100
What a weird sequel to such a weird prequel. Alien Covenant continues the story brought to us in Prometheus with an interstellar colony ship which picks up a human transmission from a habitable planet not far off course. Not wanting to spend many more years in stasis pods, the captain decides to reroute and explore the new planet with literally 45 seconds of contemplation. On the planet, David (the android from Prometheus) has gone nuts creating “perfect” xenomorphs. Though the pacing is done well and the cinematography is pretty good, there are so many pieces of the plot that make no sense, and take a direct B-line away from the trajectory they pushed for in Prometheus. I guess we still don’t really get to meet the Engineers, and it looks like David is evil now. Oh, and the only survivor from Prometheus is dead. This movie also proves that the writers are running out of ways to kill people with xenomorphs... Despite these grievances, the film does manage to tackle some very interesting sci-fi themes using David and his updated android “brother”, Walter.
3. Prometheus (2012)
Score: 84/100
Prometheus, like Nickelback, got a lot of hate and confusion when it was first released. The film, unlike Nickelback, does manage to produce some very thought-provoking and unique themes, however, which helped to revive the Alien franchise from the void. Taking place a little over 30 years before Alien, a group of explorers discover a mysterious, dead spacecraft on an alien planet… and also aliens. Though Prometheus suffers from some confusing plot scripting, the film really does find its place close to the top of the Alien totem pole after a second or third viewing. It is also gorgeously directed, combining the beauty of a strange, alien planet, with the horror of an alien xenomorph. Prometheus boasts lovely special effects and CGI as well, and contains some of the most unique (albeit cringe-worthy) gore in the franchise. Finally, the film incorporates some of the most pensive sci-fi themes in the franchise as well.
2. Aliens (1986)
Score: 88/100
The direct sequel to Alien, Aliens delivers an action packed, shoot-em-up sci-fi masterpiece to the bitter end. When contact is lost with a terraforming colony, Ripley and expendable-others are sent to investigate the situation. When they arrive, they discover the base has been turned into an alien hive, governed by an enormous alien queen. The objective: git em. The cinematography of Aliens is only matched by its predecessor, and the design and execution of the wave xenomorph models is extremely impressive to say the least. This movie also tugs heart strings with the inclusion of Newt, a child, who is the only survivor from the onslaught on the base. My only problems with this film extend from the somewhat forgettable supporting characters, and the lack of horror/suspense themes, ditched in favor of more adrenaline-fueled action. Still, this movie puts more depth into Ripley’s character, and sticks to its sci-fi horror roots pretty well.
1. Alien (1979)
Score: 95/100
In my opinion, no sci-fi horror movie has ever come close in any respect to Ridley Scott’s 1979 masterpiece, Alien. For all modern movies of any genera scrambling to find out how to write a female lead, Alien should be the staple of guidance. Not once during the movie do you consciously realize that Ripley is a woman. The writers did not make her intentionally stronger or wiser simply because she is a woman, they just made her a human. And it works impeccably. The plot of Alien is also ingenious. The horror and suspense sequences in this film will make your heart burst out of your chest, and the pacing is exactly where it should be; all twists and jump scares included. The cinematography and special effects for Alien are also top notch for the day, despite a budget of only $9 million, which makes you wonder what they fed their cast and crew to fund the creation of those xenomorph models, which are crazy realistic even by today’s standards. If you only see one movie in the Alien franchise, do yourself a favor and make it this one.
Conclusion
I hope you were sufficiently sPoOoOkEd by this movie series ranking, and if not, leave your phone somewhere public. That’ll give you a good scare. Don’t like my ranking? Kindly leave your opinions in the comments below. Now go outside, enjoy the festivities, and take some candy from people 1/5th your age!
