Review #15: 2001: A Space Odyssey
If a monolith symbolized… something? Also, if AI was scary.
“I’m sorry Dave, I’m afraid I can’t do that.” -HAL 9000
Synopsis
Millions of years ago, an ominous towering ice cream sandwich appears near an African oasis and influences some local apes to learn how to use bones as mafia clubs. Some time later, in a future where Pan Am didn’t go bankrupt, Dr. Hayward Floyd takes a spaceplane to an orbiting space doughnut. There, he bides some time awaiting a connecting flight to the Moon, which essentially makes the orbiting space doughnut the future equivalent of Atlanta. Once at the Moon base, he delivers a prepared presentation to a panel of executives regarding the recent discovery of another ice cream sandwich on the Moon. He, along with a team of scientists, are sent to investigate the monolith, but it gets mad and hisses at them. So, of course, the next logical course of action is to send an expedition to Jupiter!
Overseen by the “foolproof” HAL 9000 AI system, a team of scientists are sent on a top secret mission to Jupiter aboard a great segmented dildo. Most of the crew are in suspended animation, but some are awake to oversee the operation of the ship. One day, HAL makes a mistake, causing the crew to suspect that he might be defective. They discuss deactivating HAL in an EVA pod, the only place on the ship where HAL can’t hear them. However, HAL can lip-read like a 16-year-old schoolgirl, and deduces their plan. During a spacewalk, HAL kills one crew member by cutting his oxygen supply, and then proceeds to murder the crew who are in suspended animation. The last survivor, still outside the ship, is locked out by HAL, so he uses an airlock to force his way inside. He deactivates HAL by removing his N64 cartridges, and then discovers the ship’s true mission: to investigate the hiss from the Moon monolith, which was directed towards Jupiter. There he discovers another monolith in orbit. He takes an EVA pod to investigate, and is promptly sucked into an 80’s music video. He then get’s really old, and then really, really young. And yeah, that’s basically it.
Review
Anyone who knows someone who claims to be a fan of science fiction and hasn’t seen this movie has my literary permission to drop-kick that person. No it’s not my all-time favorite, but this movie kicks so much ass it makes Chuck Norris, Jackie Chan, and James Bond look like the Three Stooges. Just to set the tone for this review, let’s begin with a little history lesson. Science fiction as a film genre up to this point was largely regarded as a joke, or just used by thriller/horror films for a new setting. Only a tenuous smattering of sci-fi movies upheld the genre to the standard it deserved, such as Metropolis, The Day The Earth Stood Still, and War of the Worlds. This is largely because science fiction is not an easy genre to make. Science fiction often requires the depiction of futuristic technologies, space aliens, and exotic settings, which were not feasible to make believable with the cinematic technology in the first half of the 20th century. However, fueled by the Space Race in the 1950s, Hollywood quickly realized that people were rapidly becoming interested in the mysteries of the universe (and also nukes). The stage was now set for the golden era of science fiction. It just needed a spark…
Enter Stanley Kubrick and Arthur C. Clarke; possibly the world’s greatest director and science fiction mastermind of the time, respectively. Long story short, they ruffled the sheets for 5 years and out popped 2001: A Space Odyssey in 1968 — a whole year before we landed on the Moon, mind you. Anti-vaxxers can still go right to hell, but people who believe that the Moon landing was staged may be onto something, because Stan’s lunar settings are absolutely gorgeous. He literally dyed 90 tons of sand with grey coloring, as opposed to using a painted set, just to make the scenes on the Moon (which perhaps only commensurate 15 minutes of film time) feel authentic. Other sets and props were equally meticulously designed. The effects of Zero-G on ships and stations were articulated via rotating sets and synced cameras, and the white, sterile aesthetic of the orbital station has inspired an entire generation of supermarkets and Apple stores alike. Every spacecraft, structure, and station model is also terrifyingly detailed, making me wonder where the child sweatshop was hidden in Hollywood that must’ve built all these models.
As a hard sci-fi fan, it’s also noteworthy to bring up the scientific realism of this film. Yes, the set/model designs are beautiful, but they are also largely true to science and engineering. This is something that even sci-fi movies 50 years in the wake of this film still can’t seem get right. The Moon base in built in a crater. The doughnut station has a centralized docking port. The segmented dildo is segmented! This ode to true science isn’t restricted to the set designs, but also extends to the paradigms of operating and living in space. Like an Amazon package, Dr. Floyd is flown to a distribution station before embarking towards the Moon, which makes perfect sense. The crew of the Discovery II (lol, what happened to the Discovery I?) spend most of their trip in suspended animation; an entirely realistic means of interplanetary travel. Besides the obviously optimistic prediction for this technology to exist in the year 2001, this movie understands science better than every collective human that worked to create Armageddon.
2001 also tackles some heavy science fiction themes, in some cases decades before other films in the genre. The most prominent of these is the use of the HAL 9000 as a maleficent AI system. HAL is like the Terminator, but only has one red eye instead of two, and is also all around you instead of not that. The sheer concept of HAL is terrifying, but so is the fact Clarke and Kubrick conceived his character nearly half a century before AI became a real hot topic among scientists and engineers of the modern age. This movie also flirts with the concept of alien life in perhaps the most unique way ever achieved on screen: by never actually showing it at all. 2001 also presents many other groundbreaking thematic ideologies, such as the nature of our intelligence, the fragility of humanity, and how many camera angles can be used to film a segmented dildo.
I only have three major complaints about 2001: 1) Due to the script’s heavy reliance on themes and ideas, every major character is left largely underdeveloped. HAL is probably the most developed character, and he’s a f**king psychopath! I find it difficult to care about or separate the scientists and interplanetary explorers portrayed in the film when they all basically serve the plot as cardboard cutouts. 2) I wanted so hard to refrain from bringing this up, but this movie is damn long. Yes, every frame serves some overarching purpose, but when a movie’s film reel is so large that it’s on the verge of collapsing under its own gravitational pull, watching it becomes somewhat of a task. I mean, come on… there’s a literal intermission. 3) The ending. What the actual hell happens in the last 25 minutes of this movie?! I get it; it’s an interpretive and artistic portrayal of first contact. But there’s no way to actually deduce that from the content of the film. And don’t tell me you already knew that, because I know you looked it up on Wikipedia just to spite me. I still love this movie, but everything that happens from the Stargate sequence on feels like Stanley Kubrick got blasted on LSD during the last week of production.
Conclusion
2001 serves as an absolutely stunning sci-fi masterpiece, showcasing jaw-dropping special effects, gorgeous cinematography, and hauntingly realistic set designs. The film effortlessly integrates these visual spectacles with sci-fi themes decades ahead of its time, seldom skimping on scientific accuracy or plot. Though the characters are perhaps a little underdeveloped, and the ending is perhaps a little strange, it’s safe to say that 2001: A Space Odyssey wields a monolithic torch for all ensuing films in the genre.
