The 2 Things That Create Bad Habits

Remember that every bad habit started in one of two ways:

1. As a response to stress and/or fear, especially during times when we lack the tools or knowledge to cope with these intense emotions in a healthy way, we often turn to various coping mechanisms.

For children who feel rejected, bullied, or hurt, the search for something to soothe their emotional pain becomes a crucial part of their day-to-day survival.

They may find solace in behaviors or activities that provide temporary relief or distraction, such as overeating, excessive screen time, or even engaging in risky behaviors.

Similarly, adults who are under significant pressure and stress tend to look for quick fixes to alleviate their discomfort.

Whether it’s due to work demands, financial difficulties, relationship problems, or personal insecurities, the pursuit of something that can momentarily take away the pain becomes a natural reaction.

This might manifest as turning to substances like alcohol, drugs, or smoking; or indulging in other potentially addictive behaviors such as gambling, shopping, or binge-watching TV shows.

While these activities might provide short-term relief, they often fail to address the root cause of the stress or fear, and can lead to long-term negative consequences if not managed properly.

Developing healthy coping mechanisms, such as mindfulness practices, physical exercise, seeking social support, or professional therapy, is crucial for achieving lasting emotional well-being.

2. Boredom, an often underestimated emotional state, can lead to the development of various bad habits.

When people find themselves with nothing to do, they may turn to coping mechanisms that are typically unhealthy.

This is where the old saying, “idle hands are the devil’s playground,” becomes relevant.

The idea is that when we are not engaged in meaningful activities, we are more likely to engage in behaviors that can be detrimental to our well-being.

Boredom compels us to seek out activities that will occupy our time and attention. In the absence of productive or fulfilling options, people might resort to unhealthy habits.

This can include excessive snacking or eating out of boredom, leading to poor dietary choices and potential weight gain. Others might turn to mindless scrolling through social media or binge-watching television, which can result in a sedentary lifestyle and reduced physical activity.

Moreover, boredom can also lead to more harmful behaviors, such as substance abuse, where individuals use drugs or alcohol to escape the monotony of their daily lives.

Gambling, excessive spending, or engaging in risky behaviors can also stem from a desire to fill the void that boredom creates.

Finding something to do becomes an essential task, as staying idle can often exacerbate feelings of dissatisfaction and restlessness.

Engaging in hobbies, learning new skills, or participating in social activities can provide healthier alternatives and help break the cycle of negative habits.

By proactively seeking out positive and enriching activities, we can mitigate the adverse effects of boredom and promote overall well-being.

If you’re between classes, or you finished a project at work and are waiting on a coworker to supply the next one, what do you do? Can you do “busy work”?

Or are you stuck waiting?

When you’re stuck, and you want to do something, your brain looks for ways to increase your happiness. Eating is a good example. Or releasing endorphins that come from smoking is another.

Sometimes we’re coping with the fear of not belonging, of being laughed at or of being rejected.

These are fears we normally learn as children and grow up learning, and practicing over and over.

But for a child without social skills, this is something never learned.

Instead, the bullied child might find another way of coping, like eating a cookie which immediately makes the child feel better.

The brain then remembers that sugar is an easy alternative.

Soon it associates sugar as the cure for feeling bad or alone or scared.

Over the years, the reward of sugar may change into something else.

In the self-image conscious teen years, that endorphin rush may change to the endorphins released by cigarettes, or the comfort of biting one’s nails.

The reward can change and alter. That means it can change again. The reward can be something that is beneficial to your health and not detrimental.

That’s when you need to use a different reward. A hot bath, yoga, a good book, go for a walk, take a nap.

You can use whatever you enjoy and makes you feel better as an appropriate substitute.

Write it down, try to associate the reward with the trigger. Then, next time you find yourself craving something unhealthy, the alternative will come to you, and you can make an informed choice.

It’s ok to make mistakes, we all do. You only have to keep on trying, and you’ll get to where you want to be.

Linda Dawkins- Freelance blogger, Self-help Advocate, Podcaster https://anchor.fm/linda-dawkins