Quest
Questions without answers, actions without purpose.
When my eyes are closed, I get to see with my skin,
discovering new shapes and losing track.
One step forward, two steps back…
There’s no right way in the world of entropy.
A hundred miles per hour is the speed of my thoughts
in a calm state. But when they race,
I can get to Mars in the blink of an eye and return,
not having found the meaning of life there either.
The central figure of the delusion system
has never shown its face to its believers,
leaving them tête-à-tête with their mortality.
I join the hunt for the oblivion of the human condition.
The path is long; time is relentless. I am alone
in the crowd of billions walking the life.
The sweet intoxication of the present is replaced
by the inevitable hangover of future projections.
I quest for a way to outwit nature,
to flow in the endless inebriation of the now,
but the survival mode — a gift of evolution –
has the drawback of mental roaming
touching up my story with the grey of discontent.
Brief days recede into long entranced nights
with tens of other lives that rest unmarked in my book.
There’s no regret of their abrupt termination
and no fear of cessation of the characters
that inhabit the dreamy scenes of blackness.
The sun shines brightly every day,
ignoring its verdict of five billion years.
I’d also carelessly burn my given era,
not burdened by any undiscovered meanings,
if only I could hush my mind’s voice.
© Masha Zubareva 2023
My wholehearted gratitude to Franco Amati and his publication Scuzzbucket for the space and and opportunity to share.
