Scuzzbucket

Dirty realism, grunge lit, creative confessions, spec fic, and assorted literary atrocities.

Member-only story

The End as We Know It

Selina Hajarat
Scuzzbucket
Published in
2 min readNov 16, 2021

--

Photo by Hermes Rivera on Unsplash

Closed doors tainted red
Through a letter, I beg
‘please open the door
Spill your guts and smile more.’

It looks like I might be ending it all soon
What’s the point if it’s filled with doom
You’d say I’m selfish and I’ll never be
But this is all about you, none of me

Through the eyes of the public, you rise
Through the eyes of hope, a hi shall suffice

This is a dialogue running through my mind. I had a conversation with my ‘inner voice’ or whatever you would like to call it. We often overthink when we are sitting all alone and reflecting on our thoughts. What happened was fleeting, hideous thoughts running through my mind this morning as I woke up, wanting to disappear back into the void of my dreams and nightmares. It is true what they say; you have to pick yourself up and keep going. But is that the case? Shouldn’t we be still sometimes and feel what we need to feel?

I do not want to move forward and put on a charade for people; all I want is to feel the inevitable suffocation of my thoughts pouring into my mind whenever I wake up. I no longer can push them away, and there is no better time than right not to let the pain seep into my bones and crack open all the wounds.

I need to feel before I heel.

--

--

Scuzzbucket
Scuzzbucket

Published in Scuzzbucket

Dirty realism, grunge lit, creative confessions, spec fic, and assorted literary atrocities.

Selina Hajarat
Selina Hajarat

Written by Selina Hajarat

Physicist Writer of quiet things. I write to remember, unravel, and rebuild. Soft words for deep places. wherethemoonwentquiet.com

No responses yet