Letting Go
If haven’t told you yet, let me tell you now. I’m a computer geek.
When I was younger, I used to carry 10-pound books and stared at the computer screen for hours on end. You see, I was trying to type hundreds of lines of computer code to make the words “Hello World!” appear on the computer monitor. When I conversed with my best friend, we talked about things like Linux, firewalls, or Beta software. When I was once trying to court someone, I even created a flowchart of how our conversation might go. As a teenager, I read PC World instead of Car and Driver Magazine.
I’ve toned down a bit lately. I don’t carry books anymore and I don’t do any type of computer programming. I still wear eyeglasses. But instead of wearing thick, black, plastic spectacles I don a stylish, magnesium-framed, rimless eyeglass.
Regardless, I still do what most computer geeks do — I spend a lot of time in front of the computer.
Earlier tonight, I was trying to do some geeky stuff on my computer. I won’t try to bore you with the details. Suffice it to say that I was trying to fix an external USB audio device by reformatting it and reinstalling its firmware but ended up wiping out my external hard drive’s master boot record and deleting the entire My Documents folder.
If you understood what I’ve just said then you probably are as geeky as I am. But what actually happened was this — in a matter of 30 seconds, I’ve accidentally erased half a decade’s worth of data and pictures from my computer and also destroyed the backup. Unbelievable!
I was so shocked by what had transpired that I stared blankly at the computer monitor and sobbed.
The next day, I regained my composure and found a way to recover my data. But the process took so long that I decided to only recover the files that I absolutely needed.
I then realized something. I neither needed nor missed most of the computer files that were deleted! All throughout the years, I’ve held on to all sorts of digital junk. I even had the draft of my B.S. Biology thesis from 10 years ago. Why should I now care about how some algae reacts to salt?
It gets worse. I learned that most of the files that were accidentally erased were gibberish and I had no idea why I kept them in my computer.
As I was trying to save what really matters, I suddenly realized something.
I am the same way with my spiritual life.
A lot of times, I hold on to so many baggage and complicate my life with so many unnecessary things that it’s so hard to be happy and free.
Lately, a lot of people disappointed me by not living up to my expectations of them. Time has since passed but I was still holding on to a lot of anger and frustration. Because of the lesson I learned from my computer disaster, I learned to let go. Because of this, I found myself happier and more relaxed.
Things are also well with my computer, by the way. Since I’ve erased all the unneeded files, it has been running faster. It’s amazing how even a machine can benefit from letting go.
