“Barry O” & The Startup Guy

A fictional conversation on running government like a startup

Obama: Hey Startup Guy, thanks for visiting today.

Startup Guy: I’m SOO busy these days but it’s an honor to be here.

Obama: So how is your startup going?

Startup Guy: Really great. We just closed our Series B and just in time too, we are running out of office space. Our BD team is operating out of the broom closet haha. How are things here?

Obama: Can’t complain. Elections are coming up so I’m just winding down…

Startup Guy: Why don’t you go for a 3rd term? You could do something that’s never been done before!! #DisruptWashington, you know?

Obama: Well actually, FDR had a third term and the 22nd Amendment blocks me from that.

Startup Guy: Oh cool man. Speaking of disruption here, have you ever thought about applying lean startup principles to the government?

Obama: Yeah I hear that a lot…

Startup Guy: Yeah exactly, treat every bill and law like a product. Start with your MVP, which is like a sentence you know. Remember, simplicity is the essence of beauty. Keep the bills pure, and only add what’s needed.

Obama: Uhh, that’s how things start, but there’s a lot of riders and pork barrel politics..

Startup Guy: You mean from Shark Tank?

Obama: No, I’m talking about Congresspeople adding things to bills to fatten them up.

Startup Guy: Sure we’ve solved that problem in the Valley. You can either be an instinctive leader and just remove whatever you don’t like. Or, what I prefer, is just A/B test the bill. Create like 50 versions and pass one in each state and just see what performs the best and make it federal law, you know.

Obama: Well, the first is a line item veto, which I don’t have since it was ruled unconstitutional in 1998. And the second doesn’t make sense because I don’t make state laws, actually I don’t make any laws at all, that’s Congress’ job. Plus, I can’t just run bad versions of a bill because what if it hurts people?

Startup Guy: That’s exactly the benefit of A/B testing! You can distribute it so you know exactly what’s good and bad. Sure some people have a crappy experience, but you win in the long run. You’ve gotta be able to take those short term hits.

Obama: There’s a lot of issues there, but again like I said I can’t pass state laws, and I’m not gonna sign 50 bills into existence if they all contradict each other. And I definitely am not going to pass bills that target or hurt certain communities.

Startup Guy: Prez, you can’t boil the ocean. If you wanna be truly lean, you have to pick a very small audience and build it up from there. Don’t make 100M people happy, just pick 10 or 100 and really delight them. Those are the ones that will be your most loyal users.

Obama: What? All Americans are my “users”. There’s a lot more than 100 people in the White House alone.

Startup Guy: Ok, you can do your own thing. Let’s just say that you would not even be raising a seed round with that lack of focus though…

Obama: Thanks for your insight. *snarky face*

Startup Guy: So do you watch Key & Peele?

Obama: Sure I love them.

Startup Guy: Ever heard of Barry O?