Semen Retention & The Semonic Pledge
A Semen Retention Anecdote..
“Behold!”
A determined Daniel, an alleged grandmaster of semonic arts, is hosting the year’s most anticipated event:
The official Initiation Ceremony of Retentive Excellence; where mere mortals, seeking immortality, accept the strenuous challenge of rising in this retentive realm, and retaining the seed on the semonic stage.
Now, like a general leading an army into battle, Daniel dashes to the valley’s highest peak, and echoes the semonic pledge throughout the heavens of the retentive realm.
“Brothers, behold!
Before you lies the grandest challenge known to man; a challenge epically accepted and annihilated by history’s greatest men..
A battle of the ages, where mere midgets obtain the powers of giants.. And where good boys turn into gladiators. This.. is the marvelous power of the retentive man!”
Thousands of semonic soldiers, cheering from the valley’s trenches, vibrate valley grounds with retentive roar.. as masses of masculine men unite in unison, and join Daniel’s semonic pledge.
“Standing firmly before me, and scorching weakness from every section of the manosphere, is a ruthless opponent.
An opponent that has taken many lives, causes binge-faps in fives, with the force of dull blades and sharpened knives:
Lust!
Now.. while fighting on the front lines of this retentive battle, and in the very the face of this felonous opponent, i will not faint in the distance, but face the enemy with an unmatched force.
A force foreign to defeat, fatal to the fapful, and ferocious in onslaught:
Purpose.
Through the undying, unending, and consistent acquisition of purpose fulfillment, I will reach unclimbed heights that the fapful cannot fathom.
I will over-indulge in productive action and resist the shackles of stagnation, which will automatically terminate ejaculation and masturbation.
I understand, that for the seed to rise and semonic status to stretch I will spam the mind with thoughts of purity.. and think in alignment with semonic security.
For through purpose, seeds shall not fumble, semonic statues shall not fracture, and extended retention will undoubtedly fruition.”
-Semen Retention Guy
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My Semen Retention Newsletter includes the following:
Email 1: Your Dick is a Suicide Stick
Email 2: Why Poundtown is a Terrorist Nation
Email 3: The Dangers of Playing Peek-a-boo With Porn
Emails 4: (exclusive to newsletter subscribers)
