An Evening At A Clothing-Optional Resort

Elle Beau ❇︎
Feb 27 · 9 min read

What happens at night when people hang out naked together all day

Image: Adobe Stock

This is Part II of a two-part series about our visit to a clothing-optional resort. Part I is below:

After our terrific day at Desire in Cancun, Mexico, James and I were anxious to see what it was like there in the evening as well. We had a wonderful time just hanging out naked in the pool on a day-pass from a sister resort, sipping on cool drinks and talking with various friendly people we met there. However, we also knew that it would probably be a slightly different experience when the sun went down and were anxious to experience that as well.

Because Desire is a small and somewhat upscale resort, people do dress up for dinner there. Several of the restaurants on the property require long pants for men, and many of the women had on nice dresses and high heels. I wasn’t entirely sure what kind of attire was expected but did anticipate that we would be standing and/or dancing for much of the evening after dinner so I had on sparkly flat sandals and a skirt that came slightly above my knees. My chiffon top was completely sheer, showing off my bare breasts nicely.

Many of the women had clothing on that was a lot more demure, but I figured after being naked all day, it made no sense to then wear a bra or to get too covered up. Plus, I was never going to see these people again, so if I didn’t quite fit the dress code exactly, I wasn’t all that worried. Besides, I still have pretty nice tits. Why not embrace that?

James and I got there around 6:30 and had a delicious seafood dinner in one of the several restaurants. We laughed when we ran into some friends we’d made in the pool the day before because we didn’t immediately recognize each other. People really do look different when they are wearing clothing, but after we figured out that we knew each other, we said our hellos and promised to meet up at the bar later on.

At 9 pm the evening entertainment was to begin, including a band, and a show that was reflective of the theme of the evening. It was slated to be cowboys/cowgirls, but since we didn’t know that, or even that we’d be coming to this resort when we left home, we had no gear to dress for the theme. Many of the other guests embraced it to some extent, wearing a hat or some other smaller piece of Western wear but many others didn’t bother.

Since I’m always hungry on the earlier side, especially after a long day of being out in the sun, I was glad that we’d eaten at 6:30, but it did mean we had some time to kill before the show started. There were a few other people at the outdoor bar area near to where the evening’s entertainment was to be, so we headed over that way. Two of our friends from the previous day had changed from dinner attire into sexy schoolgirl costumes which made me feel less self-conscious about my see-through top.

I was chatting with some people I’d just met at the bar when suddenly there were a pair of hands covering my eyes. It turned out the hands were attached to a cow costume, worn by one of the staff members we’d met the day before in the pool. Although it’s a clothing optional resort, the staff are always fully dressed (or in a complete bathing suit) but I really laughed at this funny cow outfit on this beautiful young Russian woman, especially since it had a trap door, through which you could see her bikini bottom-clad ass.

Apparently, she remembered me from the day before and was coming over to say hello. I can’t remember her name now but she had a really fun, playful demeanor. Pretty soon, another staff member who had been in the pool with us came over, dressed like a cowboy, but he was having a harder time remembering who I was, so I laughingly lifted my top.

“Do you remember me now,” I said since as I mentioned earlier, people do look different with clothes on? That seemed to help, although I think it was probably more that my voice and face were starting to register for him. Still, it was a funny exchange. That seems like a great job to spend your days helping people have fun at a clothing-optional resort, although they did seem to work pretty long hours. Still, for people in their 20s, that seems like a pretty great gig.

Pretty soon the evening’s entertainment was getting ready to start and we stood with our friends from the day before and watched the floor show, which was quite elaborate and well done. Next, the band started in, playing a variety of cover songs, and dance music. James and I had been taking swing lessons for a couple of months, and also picked up the Texas two-step, so we tried those out when the right sort of song came on. There was another couple there who were really accomplished dancers and we looked somewhat pathetic next to them, but since we weren’t there to compete — we were there to have fun, we just laughed when we flubbed a move or missed an exchange, and kept on dancing, sometimes reverting part way through a song to dancing with no set steps at all.

By 10:30 or so, our friends were ready to head to the nightclub, so we went along with them. This was the venue where James and I had taken our tantric yoni massage class the day before, but it looked completely different without mattresses all over the floor. (For more about that, read Part I) We refreshed our drinks and had a look around. The main dance floor area was just as you might expect, with a bar at one end, but there was a back room with a curved sex lounger in it. At that point in the evening, there was no-one in that back room other than us although I would have loved to have tried out the lounger, but perhaps not on display.

I’ve had sex in front of a room full of people before when James and I used to go to a swinger’s club, just to see what it would be like to do that, and although it was interesting, in general, I prefer a bit more privacy. It turns out, I’m not really an exhibitionist at heart. Maybe someday I’ll get to try out some sex furniture in a less public venue. After checking out the back room, we returned to the nightclub, where people were dancing and drinking, just like they do in nightclubs everywhere.

There was one major difference from most nightclubs, however. Everyone, and every woman, in particular, was perfectly safe and comfortable. No-one was trying to coerce someone else into going home with them or grinding up against someone who didn’t want that to be happening. Everyone was happy and enjoying themselves, and those who were grinding were doing it with someone who welcomed that. There was some kissing and touching taking place, but mostly between couples who had come there together, although one group had two women and a man dancing closely. In any case, whatever was going on was consensual.

The feeling of safety and ease doesn’t just come from the crowd being comprised mostly of couples. James and I had been to swinger’s clubs before where the crowd wasn’t made up entirely of couples and it had the same vibe. It comes from the ethos of these kinds of sex-positive spaces, where consent is normalized and no one feels entitlement around anyone else’s body. It means that everyone can be flirty, sexually self-expressed, or anything else that they want to be as long as it is respectful of other people, and have a lot of fun.

James and I danced a lot that night, both with each other and with others from the group of friends we’d met the day before in the pool. No more Texas two-step — this dancing was more primal and raw. I wasn’t particularly attracted to any of the men, but that didn’t mean that I wasn’t up for dancing with some of them, because I didn’t have to worry about whether or not they would take a dance to necessarily mean anything more than that, even if it was a sexy dance. I danced with several of them, and with a few of the women as well.

We never did get to see what if anything else might have developed with anyone because unfortunately, our guest pass expired at midnight, and James and I didn’t want to turn into pumpkins. There was less hooking up than we might have expected, but as we knew from our time in swinger’s clubs, that often relates to the makeup of the crowd on that particular night, and like I said, we weren’t interested in anyone in particular, so it was fine. From what we’d heard from friends we’d met in the pool, the hot tub was the place where people tended to get together, but that typically took place in the early evening, and we’d never been there at that time. No problem.

Sex-positive doesn’t necessarily equate to indiscriminate sexual activity and that was what we experienced. People were open to finding sexual connections, but it wasn’t a necessity. It really depended on chemistry and whether it felt right in the moment. If not, then things didn’t progress. We knew from what we’d heard from those who were staying at this resort that more sexual activity was going on than what we witnessed, and that was completely fine.

Hooking up wasn’t our main objective when visiting Desire. We really just enjoyed the sex-positive atmosphere and the chance to be with other open-minded people who view nudity and sexuality as something wholesome and real. The potential for getting with other people was certainly available and even fostered, but it also wasn’t the main objective of the place. That’s what we really liked about it. It wasn’t a den of iniquity but it had the potential for intimate connection if that felt like the right thing.

After being naked together all day, it seemed only natural to at least consider getting together with people who interested us, but since we didn’t really have much interaction with people who truly attracted us in that way, being naked just translated to being open and comfortable in our own skins. I would wish that for more people — the opportunity to be open and free with the possibility of sexual expression, but without that being necessarily expected or demanded. It was a really good time, that left us feeling very relaxed and open, without a bunch of artificial masks to wear.

We look forward to the time when we can safely travel back there and try it out again from the perspective of someone who is actually staying at the resort, and not just there on a several hours pass, as fun as those were. We’ve also recently learned that they are now accepting throuples, and so a dream vacation would be to go there with our lover, Tamara. I don’t know when something like that is going to be possible, but it’s certainly something to anticipate and plan for. Based on our prior experiences, I can only imagine that we’d have the best time ever.

© Copyright Elle Beau 2021
Elle Beau writes on Medium about sex, life, relationships, society, anthropology, spirituality, and love. If this story is appearing anywhere other than Medium.com, it appears without my consent and has been stolen.

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Elle Beau ❇︎

Written by

Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

Sensual: An Erotic Life

A sex-positive community for exploring and sharing.

Elle Beau ❇︎

Written by

Dispelling cultural myths with research-driven stories. My favorite word is “specious.” Not fragile like a flower; fragile like a bomb! Twitter @ElleBeau

Sensual: An Erotic Life

A sex-positive community for exploring and sharing.

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