Missives on Erotic Photography
Creation vs exploitation
There’s nothing more controversial in the photography world than erotic photography. It’s right up there with the Canon vs Nikon flame wars and film vs digital “debates.”
Why is it so controversial? Because it can be easily exploited and perverted. There’s a fine line between an erotic photo that’s artistic and one of exploitation. One is quality and the other is just plain yuck.
You can argue that we all consume photography, just as we do with writing on Medium. We create works of any kind and hope that we get enough eyeballs on them to earn some money or build a name for ourselves, but do we ever come back to the main question? Why do we do this?
Yes, I’ve shot boobs, butts, bush, and wieners.
For me to answer that question I need to give you a bit of a backstory on me. I love photography and have been taking and making photos ever since 1999. I call myself a hobbyist photographer now because I’m doing it for fun but there was a time I would’ve labeled myself a semi-pro photographer.
Semi-pro in the sense that I was hired a few times by couples and individuals for erotic and boudoir work.
Yes, I’ve shot boobs, butts, bush, and wieners.
How did I get there? That’s an interesting story and the basis for my thoughts on erotic photography.
The Backstory
In the summer of 1998, a dear old college friend visited me in New Mexico. I hadn’t heard from him since he dropped out of college and I got a call out of the blue one day. He said, “Hey man! I’m driving through Albuquerque, wanted to know if I can crash and we can hang out.”
Of course, I said yes, it would be great to reconnect with him and I was feeling a bit down for the past few months. Visitors were always welcome.
Over time I had a basic command of my camera and my photos sucked less.
He drove up to my apartment complex a few days later and we went out to dinner. He told me his story of how he dropped out of college, bummed around for a few months, and then started working as an assistant for a commercial photographer. He was a photographer now and got to travel around the country on all kinds of jobs.
I was intrigued. He seemed so happy about his job, in contrast to me, I hated my job.
He wanted me to take him on a scenic tour of NM, especially the off-beaten places. It was amazing to watch him. He would see so much beauty hidden in plain sight where I would just drive by and not even notice. His attention to detail and connection with everything around him was infectious. He was a passionate man and I wanted to be like him. Passionate and connected to everything around me.
We had a great weekend before he drove off to California for a gig and we stayed connected till this day. He inspired me so much that I saved up some money and bought my first real film camera.
Then I started shooting and thought I was hot shit. All the photos were terrible, but I persisted and started to learn. I learned about exposure, aperture, lighting, all the important basics to making a photo.
Over time I had a basic command of my camera and my photos sucked less.
Then one day an acquaintance approached me with his girlfriend. She wanted to know if I would help my acquaintance (her boyfriend) learn how to take “artful nudes” of her.
There was tenderness, strength, and eroticism all wrapped up in that image.
I found that to be an odd request but we all were adults (18+) and I never shot nudes before, so I said yes. It would be a learning event for all of us.
That conversation started many weekends of the three of us shooting together and her nude and in varying stages of undress. On beds, in the woods, in lingerie, on couches, etc.
Looking back at the slides, most of the photos we made were “ok,” I wasn’t happy with them but she was ecstatic with them.
Then something happened.
At one of our last photoshoots together I made a photo of her that opened my eyes to the power of erotic photography.
I had captured her femininity in all its glory.
I was on the floor looking up at her. She wore stockings and a garter belt. Her hair fell around her face and she put her hand on the stocking as if she was fixing it. Her nipples were covered by her hair but you could see the shape of her breasts. The lighting in the room was perfect and I snapped the shutter.
I didn’t think of that moment until the film was developed and I saw the image. My jaw hit the floor.
She was beyond beautiful. Her pose, the hair, and everything combined with the lighting made her look like a Goddess. There was tenderness, strength, and eroticism all wrapped up in that image. I had captured her femininity in all its glory.
Oftentimes these photoshoots become a violation of consent.
Up till that point, I had always associated erotic photography with porn. It was at that moment that I realized there is art in eroticism and that erotic photography can be transcending.
And this is where things get controversial.
Exploitation & GWCs
First and foremost, I know many adult content creators. Whether it’s nudes, sex toy reviews, photos, books, or whatever, I don’t begrudge any of you for your hustle. Making content is hard work and you need to put food on the table BUT what makes me happy for you is that you are controlling the narrative. That’s key!
Just like with any healthy sexual relationship, erotic photography requires communication and consent.
Why is that key? Because in today’s sex-negative society, eroticism can easily be exploited. It happens all the time and it must stop.
The biggest offenders are GWCs or Guys With Cameras. They approach erotic photography as a way to get ‘girls naked.’ They lure a model in with the promise of money in exchange to get naked in front of their camera.
They do it to satisfy their sexual desires or want to see if they can get a woman naked and make her do “nasty” things. Oftentimes these photoshoots become a violation of consent.
A perfect example is the accusation of exploitation and abuse by model Kaori of erotic photographer Araki.
But KaoRi says she ended up being objectified and exploited. “[H]e would tell made up stories about me in TV and magazine interviews, create and sell one book after the other without me knowing, give them titles like ‘KaoRi Sex Diary’ without my consent, make me pose in extreme ways in front of audiences, take all the credit for my performances,” she writes. Because of the stories he told about her, she says, “I was constantly hurt by daily harassment and stalking, fake videos of me disseminated on the internet, and friends who believed in the lies.”
Just like with any healthy sexual relationship, erotic photography requires communication and consent. You need to discuss what you want to shoot, how to shoot it, what the limitations are, how the photos will be used, copyrights, etc.
It’s the experience and the connection that creates something larger then itself.
Why? Because an erotic photo is made even before you press the shutter. It’s a two (or many) way street between photographer and model. It’s collaborative and not selfish. It’s mutually fulfilling artwork together.
Eroticism is in the Mind
There’s a vulnerability in opening up in front of the camera. There’s the model in front of the lens and then there is the photographer. Everyone always assumes that it’s the model that’s the vulnerable one but to make a powerful erotic image, the photographer needs to be vulnerable too.
In a true collaborative session, there should be more talking and less snapping.
Here’s a snippet from an interview with Ryan Muirhead that captures it perfectly.
It’s the experience and the connection that creates something larger than itself.
The common saying is that the biggest sex organ is the mind, and that’s true. We dream of our current and past lovers, the last kiss that was shared, and even the wild night before.
Some of us write these stories, others speak about them, and some try to capture them in photos.
Whatever medium we choose to share our eroticism with the world it has to be healthy and sex-positive in my opinion. We need to be more connected to that truth now more than ever.
