Journey Day 1

I don’t know about you, but I am thinking all the time. Like constantly thinking, so when I turn on a sermon dvd or music I turn it up loud… it’s not to make an outside statement or to violate sound discretion, it just gets me to “listen” instead of thinking. And it is a relief. To listen.

Let me give you an example: This morning around 4am I was thinking should I do a dietary fasting? Maybe like drinking water and a variety of teas that have healthy herbs. Do more praying, I really don’t pray enough. Martin Luther prayed for three hours at a time… I could do that. Sure. Why not? And move. I’ve got to start moving more. Maybe move and pray… Can I do that for a few hours? (Taking mini breaks throughout, of course.) John the Baptist.. Why did he baptize in the lake? Was it a lake or river? I gotta look that up. I should read Johns story. I don’t think I understand John the Baptists mission. The messenger. I need to see what I have on him. Poor guy. Him being beheaded… he had doubts if what he was doing was right and he ended up beheaded… that’s just so unfair God…? — pause — I really liked that sermon on youtube, I should turn it on and start stretching — (punching the air, raising my arms up and down, punching to the side) …. now its going on 5am…

What do I have to do? So many things I have to do and I wallow in self pity! Ugh! I hate my pitifullness! Gotta wake the boys and wash them up for school. I can’t forget the paperwork…

Constantly thinking, overthinking, restless thinking. Gotta get ready and get my boys ready…

The “Day 1" is almost over. I accomplished more then I had bargained, considering some major set backs like the school calling and telling me one son couldn’t breath… So, spent most of the afternoon at Children’s Hospital but all is good. Looks like colds will be circulating the household, so stocking on some decongestants and Kleenex! =) I did more walking then I have in a while. I actually think getting all that walking helped me not be so blah-zay…

This blogging helps the loneliness…

If you are a single parent and your kids start to claim their independence and there’s no other adult to converse with… you understand what I mean.

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