10 Sensual and Flirtatious Activities For You and Your Partner
From the extravagant to the simple, explore new levels of intimacy and expressions of sexuality.
Whether you’ve been together for a few weeks or a few decades, in a committed relationship or enjoying casual sex with fuck buddies, monogamous or polyamorous, explorations of our bodies, our relationships, and our sexuality never end.
This list of games and activities go beyond sex. Use them to get to know each other better and traverse different kinds of intimacy.
Before we get into the good stuff, it goes without saying that consent and clear boundaries are significant regardless of your relationship status. No one has to do anything that they don’t want to do, or that makes them uncomfortable. Saying no is valid, and it just means you’re learning more about each other and what you like and don’t like.
1. Pizza Box
Maybe the sun is going down on an evening of Netflix and pizza, or you’ve got a piece of cardboard laying around that’s waiting to be the centerpiece of your sexy night (it’ll be sexier than it sounds, I promise). This version of Pizza Box is a sensual twist on a classic drinking game.
In the original game, each participant puts their drink in front of them, draws a circle around it, and writes their name inside. For the sexy version, the idea is the same, but instead of your name, write a sensual action, like kiss neck, oral, suck nipple, be creative as you want. If there are only two of you, you could put down two or three each. Just make sure there is empty space left.
The rules are simple. Flip a coin; if it lands in a circle, you have to do whatever it says to the other person. If you land in a blank space, you get to draw a circle and come up with a new action. Be inventive, smile, moan, cum, laugh. Every action doesn’t have to be inherently sexy if that’s the game you want to make. Go for as long as you want and see where it takes you!
2. Sex Jar
The name doesn’t sound very sensuous, but I promise it is. Get a jar and some popsicle sticks (or an old deck of cards you don’t mind writing on works too), and write down different fantasies. Choose a stick and try it out.
There are a lot of different ways you can approach this activity:
- Make an evening out of it or have the jar on hand for whenever you want to spice things up.
- Color code sticks to make different categories so you can tailor your experience to your evening: sex positions, role-play prompts, role-play characters, fantasies, kinks, whatever you’re interested in.
- Create two categories. Choose one of each and put them together to determine the action, for example, adjectives (cold, wet, quiet, fast) and actions (oral, doggy, massage, fingering). You might have to get creative. Wet massage? Do it in the shower. Cyber masturbation? Go to separate rooms and video call each other. You could also choose different verbs and body parts. The sky is the limit.
3. Follow the Rules
My boyfriend and I like doing this a lot to change things up. Follow a new rule or ‘theme’ for a day. This is more of an activity than a game and goes well with the sex jar (or sex cards) I mentioned above. You can also organize a week of activities, or even a month. Here are some we’ve done:
- Kama Sutra calendar. You can choose your own positions you’ve been dying to try or find a calendar online. Urban Outfitters sells a very affordable and super entertaining Position of the Day Playbook.
- Kiss anywhere except the mouth for a day. We kiss each other a lot in passing throughout the day, so it’s always fun to find new places to kiss each other, sexually or romantically.
- No cumming. Have as much sex as you want, but no orgasms allowed. It’s a day-long tease (the next day is always explosive).
It’s easy to get stuck in a routine. Intentionally changing it up allows you to break out of your habits and learn new ways to express yourself and receive your partner.
4. Guess the Item
This is a game from Relish that plays with your sense of touch. Blindfold your partner and trace their body with different objects. These can be sexual objects or totally random, like feathers, ice cubes, belts, forks, or fruit.
The longer it takes them to guess, the better. And of course, if you decide no body part is off-limits, choose objects safely and wisely.
5. Aural Sex
Most of our sexual encounters revolve around touch. Try making love with just your words, no touching.
Read erotic fiction to each other. You can even write your own if you’re feeling fancy. Enjoy each other’s voices. This may be a totally new way for you to navigate sex with another person.
Pay attention to their words. You’ll learn a lot about the other’s interests and fantasies based on what erotica they choose. You might even want to act it out afterward.
6. Shave each other
I know, I know. Not a game. But, this is an excellent way to pamper each other, appreciate each other, and experience new kinds of physical contact.
Lather each other up and take your time. Take a warm bath to prep your skin and spend some quality time together. Put lotion on each other afterward. Shave designs onto each other. There are no rules (except being gentle).
7. Truth or Dare
Another classic, but a good one. All of the questions and dares don’t have to be inherently sexual. Get to know each other and enjoy each other’s company. When I think I’ve learned all there is to know about my boyfriend, he always surprises me with something new.
8. Sexy Suits
This game is a total tease from RedbookMag. Grab a deck of cards and assign each suit a meaning. For example, hearts mean oral, spades equal anal play, diamonds are massage, and clubs mean kissing. The numbers signify how many seconds or minutes (up to you) each tease should last. Take turns drawing cards until you can’t stand it anymore.
The first one to orgasm wins?
9. Blind Body Art
You may have played the game where you draw or write something on someone’s back with your finger, and they have to guess what it is. The idea is the same but a little more adult, and a lot more sensual.
Put on some sexy lingerie, those hot new boxer briefs you bought last week (I’m a sucker for those), or just strip it all the way down. Choose different body parts (blindfold if needed) and draw on each other’s bodies. Get creative with your art utensil of choice: a finger, a toe, lotion, massage oil, your tongue. If they guess it right, give them a prize they’ll never forget.
10. Edging Relay Race
This game is not for the faint at heart, and it’s pretty much what it sounds like. I had never masturbated in front of anyone until my current boyfriend and I were forced into a long-distance relationship. I was insecure about my self-pleasure, and it never occurred to me to go on that adventure with another person. Watching him pleasure himself and letting him watch me do something so personal and intimate has deepened our connection and opened our relationship to new levels of intimacy and familiarity.
If mutual masturbation is something you and your partner enjoy or would like to try, and if you like edging and a good tease, you’ll love this game. Take turns pleasing yourselves in front of each other. Use sex toys or go au naturel. When you’re about to orgasm, stop. Then, it’s your partner’s turn.
Or, if you’re like me and it takes you a while to get aroused (especially under pressure), let a timer tell you when it’s time to switch. For example, 3 minutes and then switch. Keep going back and forth like this. But don’t cum until you’re both about to explode.