A Man’s Job in the Bedroom
What is a man’s responsibility to a female partner?
The very first time I did not experience an orgasm during a sexual encounter, I was incredibly disappointed. I’d been warned by other women in my life not to expect orgasms during sex (which I now think is a ridiculously low bar to set), but I’d never had trouble achieving orgasms on my own, and was pretty reliably able to climax with my first partner.
It wasn’t his skill, per se, and it certainly wasn’t mine. I was shy, ashamed, and uncommunicative, but I at least knew the kind of stimulation I needed to get off and was able to adjust my body in ways that helped me get to orgasm.
I felt secure that if I wanted an orgasm, I’d always be able to have one with my boyfriend, not taking into account the fact that sometimes, a guy might come before his partner, despite his best efforts to hold off.
The first time this happened, I was about two or three minutes from my own orgasm, and so jacked up I thought the top of my head was going to come off.
I was too shy to ask him to orally or manually attend to me, and all I could think to do was ask if he might be willing to go again in a little while. I was shocked when his response was to call me demanding. Then he got dressed and went home, slamming my front door behind…
